Lethal
by ditz4lyf
Summary: Bella Swan isn't your average vampire, She was changed by the Volturi and now she with them. She's the perfect vampire. So what happens when she meets Edward? What do they want her to do? EXB
1. Chapter 1

**20 years back**

When the Volturi found me I was only 16 years old with no life at all. My mom was getting married to some guy I hardly even knew and I never saw my father enough to allow him to get the chance to ever know me.

One time, in the early morning, I woke up feeling uneasy. I could feel someone staring at me through the window in my room and it sent icy shivers up and down my back. I went over to my window to try and see a face but I couldn't see anything abnormal.

This was the first time I had an uneasy feeling like that, but it certainly was not the last. The uneasy feeling never seemed to subside after that night but constantly made itself known while I would drive home from school and make my way to work.

I used to think it was the worst feeling ever but I could never have been more wrong. One day a nice looking man, Aro, came up to me while I was at work. He asked me questions about different things and seemed genuinely kind and caring so when he asked me to help bring the items he needed for his camping trip to his car, I couldn't say no.

After that things happened so fast. The only things I can remember about my human life are a blur and don't make any sense at all. When the burning sensation finally came to a complete stop I could here Aro's voice singing to me asking me how I felt. Reluctantly I opened my eyes to see me in a place I did not know. I felt awkward and different not fully grasping why my clothes where no longer fitting to my form.

My skin had become paler but still held some color; my hair was much longer with beautiful waves that had golden highlights running through them. I subtly got up trying to find a mirror to see what had happened.

The room was seemed to be fairly small, joining to a separate living room. A hotel room perhaps? On the far left side of the bedroom I saw a mirror. I walked gracefully over to it and was shocked at my reflection. The girl I was once knew was not the girl I was looking at but someone unnaturally breath taking and unreal.

My hair was a gorgeous dark brown with random rays of sunlight streaking through it and my eyes a striking light blue. I had become taller, skinnier, and my curves had become rounder. My lips had become fuller and my face was perfect. My mouth hung open and all I could do was gawk and stare at this person. Suddenly, I could see Aro standing behind silently watching me with sharp eyes.

He smiled slightly when my eyes met his and all he said was "I think I need to explain a few things to you". After that my life was never the same.

He told me I was a vampire and when I laughed in his face I heard a voice that was foreign to me and it took me a while to realize it was mine. He told me he was going to take me to Italy and when I asked why, he told me it was because I was special, amazingly unique.

While on the plane he informed me on why he chose me and why he made me into a vampire. There had been a store full of customers but out of everyone he had chosen me. It didn't make any sense at all to me but to him it had made all the sense in the world. My body was unique. None of the Volturi's powers could work on me. They had tried over and over again testing their different powers on me during the night, while I was at school, and when I would work because surely I would have to fall for someone, but I did not. When I asked him what his power was he told me that he could read what ever he wanted to read in someone's mind, but only if he was touching them.

_"So tell me what I'm thinking"_

When I held out my hand he took it cautisiouly, as if I was diseased and then tried to hear my thoughts after a few seconds he looked at me warily saying_ "I can not hear a thing"_

With that, I smiled.

He told me that the Volturi had been watching me for a while, trying to decide whether or not to change me. They decided I would be changed and now I was to live with them.

Present 

By now I had found my place in the Volturi, which was second place. I was not ahead or Aro, Marcus, or Caius but I was directly beneath them, which meant above everyone else. I was the strongest of everyone, even them. I learned my power within just a few days of being changed. I was most human, most dangerous. If I walked into the sun, I do not glitter like a bunch of diamonds; I could chose to eat human food instead of dine on the next human that crossed my path and I even had the power to sleep.

Although those powers had all seemed miraculous to Aro, I did a great job in stunning him again. I was the fastest, I was the strongest, I was the smartest, and I was the most cunning. I was the perfect vampire. Not only were my powers my weakest point, but they where also my strongest. My ability to seem human to other vampires and other creatures made me seem vulnerable and an easy target; however, I was the most dangerous and most lethal object in the world, especially when my senses became heightened to the fullest potential.

I usually never worked in Italy with the Volturi, it was too boring, and there was nothing to do. Instead, I worked in many places. I traveled the world going anywhere I knew I would find vampires. I reported to the Volturi about everything I saw and came across. Almost every vampire alive had a file in Italy with descriptions about them and it was my job to add onto it. I went around behaving like the average human, watching them with their every move. I knew everything.

Then randomly, Aro asked me to visit a random place called Forks. Since I had nothing else to do I agreed without much emotion. I had to check up on a group of vampires that the Volturi didn't exactly care for. The Cullens' where a group of non-average vampires that I had yet to meet. I was asked to attended the high school at which they were attending to and get as close to the Cullen's as I possibly could.

This was going to be the easiest thing in my life.


	2. Chapter 2

Aro had everything planned out before I even made it to Forks. I was going to be living with a man named Charlie. Apparently he was seeing if he wanted to adopt me or not. Aro told me he lost his only daughter two years ago. A year after that accident he had been making constant visits to an orphanage away from the little town. He received a phone call from the orphanage declaring that they where receiving a new girl, Isabella Swan, from Florida and they thought that she and him would make a great pair because she had lost her family in a car crash around the same time he lost his daughter. After a little persuasion, he agreed.

The Voltui had done their job, and now it was time to do mine. It was my job to convince Charlie that I could stay with him. In other words, I needed to convince him to not take me back to the orphanage.

Charlie had met me at the airport. I could smell how nervous he was before I even made it out of the plane. When I walked off the plane and though the few passengers that had been on the plane with me, it was easy to find Charlie.

He was standing near the back of the wall rocking back and forth from the top of his toes to his heels. I slowly made my way toward him being careful not to frighten him. I stopped in front of him, leaving a good four to five feet between us.

"Hi. My name is Bella Swan and I was wondering if you where Charlie?"

He stared at me for a long moment as if he had forgotten completely about why he was standing in the middle of the airport and then suddenly he smiled. He was careful to not touch me when he closed the distance between us and went to take the bag I had off of my shoulder.

He slowly led me through the small airport to the baggage claim, where I only had to grab a single bag. The car ride home was filled with tension and uneasiness. He was trying to become more comfortable around me by asking me questions about myself, trying to understand who I was, but it wasn't making the tension lesson.

He asked me simple questions about my favorite foods, places, and sports. His small talk was nice but didn't make him any less nervous and I began to wonder that Aro could have picked the wrong person for this job.

We finally stopped at a small, two-story house that Charlie called home. When he got out of the car he made his way over to my door and ungracefully opened it for me. I smiled light-heartedly and got out.

He then when into the back of the car and pulled out my two bags with somewhat of an effort and brought it up to the door. He pulled out his keys to unlock it and then held the door open for me allowing me to walk in. I walked in and started to look around a room that seemed to be the living room.

He started to carry my bags up the stairs and into what I assumed to be the guest bedroom. It was a nice clean room that would need a lot of girly touch up. If I was going to have to stay here for as long as I thought I would have to, this whole entire room was going to be remodeled because I was planning on spending most of my time in this tiny room.

He smiled at me and then gave me a tour of the small house. He occasionally made a really bad joke but I laughed at it non-the less. He seemed pleased by my efforts to make him feel comfortable.

He started to tell me about the new school I would be attending at tomorrow, telling me about how since this was a small town and all, everyone was excited I would be coming to school tomorrow. Everyone was looking forward to meeting me. I was told if I got up by 6:00 a.m. that I would have plenty of time to get ready for school and that for at least my first week at school, Charlie had decided he would drive me to school.

I had insisted in walking to school, it wasn't that far. I knew where the school was since we drove by it when I came from the airport but Charlie said that was out of the question for the time being.

It was 7:00 p.m. by now and I told Charlie that since tomorrow was going to be my first day at a new school, that I wanted to take a shower and go right to sleep. When he had offered to make me some dinner, I declined it kindly and said that I had eaten a large snack on the plane.

I made my way up the stairs and took a nice long shower allowing myself to think about the people I would meet the next day. I changed into my pajamas, told Charlie goodnight, and laid on top of my bed. I never went to sleep. I thought the whole entire night about the different things I would be able to tell Aro, Caius, and Marcus soon and the new people I would meet.

Before I knew it, my clock hit 6:00 a.m. and I jumped out of bed. I ran the brush quickly through my perfect hair and put an outfit on that made my eyes stand out even before my beauty and ran down stairs to see an eating Charlie.

I grabbed a cereal bar just for his sake and he quickly finished his food and ushered me into the car for my first day of school.

I had talked Charlie out of trying to take me into the office, insisting that the schools wasn't big enough for me to get lost in and if everyone was as nice as him, then I was sure that if I ever did need help, they would show me the way.

He shrugged in defeat and allowed me out of the car. As I shut the door closed I gave him a comforting smile and a wave goodbye.

It was a breath of fresh air to finally be left alone. It was going to be an adjustment for me because I was so used to doing everything alone and by myself, it felt so weird to have someone concerned about me who didn't even know me.

As I turned around toward the school, I made my way to a light beige building that had a sign hanging over one of the doors with the name "Office" written on it. I gracefully made my way over to the door noticing that everyone of the students and teachers that where walking around the school stop and stare.

I opened the office door and felt a burst of warm air fly my hair back out of my face and back behind my shoulders.

I saw a lady behind the front desk with snowy white hair busily working around doing something. I walked over casually.

"Hello, I'm Bella Swan and it's my first day of school here. I was wondering if you had my schedule?"

Her hands stopped working, her head snapped up, and her eyes immediately locked with mine. She wore a huge smile on her face and her eyes twinkled with that of an elated four year old.

" Oh my! Well I am Mrs. Cope! It is so good to meet you we have been waiting for you for a couple of days now!"

She quickly handed me some sheets of paper. One with my schedule, another a map of the school (as if I needed that), and more random sheets of paper that where probably completely irrelevant to me.

"Would you like me to bring you to your first class or would you like me to ask one of the students…"

"No, thank you. It's been a pleasure Mrs. Cope"

I smiled and hurriedly made my way out of the door. I still had fifteen minutes before the bell rang for the students to get to class. I felt the constant stares from everyone all over my body. I rarely ever felt uncomfortably but uncomfortable hardly described the way I felt right now. Antsy was more of a suitable word.

I started to head further into the school to make my way to my first hour teacher but some stupid looking kid jumped in front of me out of the blue. Normally, humans tend to shy away from vampires, but I was more human than anything so I never really bothered them.

"Hi, I'm Mike Newton! You must be Isabella Swan."

I had to resist the urge to walk right over the annoying kid so I put a cheery mask on instead.

"Hey Mike I'm Bella."

"Do you want me to walk with you to your first hour class?"

I looked at my paper for a minute trying to decide if I really wanted to spend any more time with this kid than I had already.

" No thanks I think I have it."

I smiled warmly and pushed by him feeling him glare into my back. I kept smiling as I walked until I sensed something. It wasn't the stare from one of the students or a teacher watching me as I passed by, but it was something. I slowed my walk and turned my head slightly to my right allowing my eyes to flicker to the things watching me.

They were gorgeous, yes, but they could hardly compare to me. The blonde girl seemed to be glaring madly at me, which made a full-blown smile appear onto my face. A beautiful girl with short black hair stood next to her with curios eyes and so did the rest of the group. There were three more people in the group, all of them male. The first one I noticed was massive in size, the second much skinnier than the first one with blonde hair and a soft face. The last one I saw had his hair in beautiful disarray and was glaring at me curiously. Our eyes locked for an unnerving amount of time.

I broke the eye contact and walked into my classroom and took a seat in the back after introducing myself to the teacher and finding out where the only open seat in the room was. The bell rang and kids starting pouring slowly into the classroom.

The first three classes passed by uneventfully and I had very short conversations with some kids who already considered me to be their friends because they had the nerve to start a conversation with me. At lunch I sat next to a girl named Jessica who seemed to have to let everyone see her with me. She was talking about something I really didn't care to know about so I started looking around the room trying to find something interesting going on.

A few tables away I saw them sitting together, all five of them. I was staring at the one I had the staring contest with earlier. Suddenly his head snapped towards me and his eyes glued to mine again.

"He's gorgeous isn't he?"

The only thing I could do was raise my eyebrows because I couldn't stop staring.

"Umm…he's okay. What's his name?"

"Edward Cullen. He's the only free one right now. The rest are all taken but he never dates anyway. Jasper, the blonde one, and Alice, the one with black hair are both going out. Rosalie and Emmett are both going out as well. It sounds weird at first because they all live togethor but it's also because they are adopted."

"Hmm."

Finally I broke my eye contact with him to continue to let her talk about irrelevant things while I watched the clock with mild interest waiting for lunch to end. Once the bell rang I quickly ran from Jessica to get to my next class, Biology. Everyone had already made it into class and when I walked in, I found the boy Jessica told me was Edward Cullen.

The teacher looked over at me and told me to take a seat next to him and we both looked unsettled. As I walked to take my seat the wind from the air conditioning hit me as I walked underneath the vent and his eyes turned pitch black and his hands clenched underneath his desk as if I was going to be the death of him.

I smiled widely at him now. I knew exactly what was bothering him, the smell of my blood. Although I was a vampire, my power became unbelievably helpful. Although I had no heart beat, I still had the same scent I had when I was alive. I took my seat next to him as he scooted his over to the farthest side of the desk.

"Hi, I'm Bella."

He barely even made his head turn 45 degrees in my direction to acknowledge me. This was going to be both interesting and fun!

**Okay people here is Chapter 2! Review! It helps my writing improve, helps you to understand whatever question you have and it feels great! Also if you like my story, can you help me get it out by recommending it to people? It would be appreciated! Thanks so much!**

Ditz4lyf


	3. Chapter 3

The last few weeks went by uneventfully. The Cullen's where quite and kept to themselves. They didn't invite anyone into their little group. No one seemed to try and get close to the Cullen's and they didn't try to be close with any of the humans either. After my first day when I met Edward, he didn't go back to school for a couple of days which amused me.

Even though it had been about two months since my first day at school, everyone still seemed to be a bit unsettled by my arrival. Even the Cullen's seemed a bit curious but did a very good job at hiding it.

Unlike the Cullen's who secluded themselves from the rest of the school, I had to eat with students Mike and Jessica and all the rest of their friends. According to the entire student body, Mike and Jessica where my best friends, but according to me, they where the last people on Earth I wanted to be with.

Today lunch seemed to be going by slower than usual. The second hand on the clock was taking longer and longer to even make one single 'tick'. Jessica tapped me lightly on the shoulder, bringing my thoughts to a complete halt so I could focus on the present.

I had been pretending to be reading the Biology book I had borrowed from my teacher, randomly turning pages as if I was actually reading it. I turned my head slightly towards her placing my index finger on a random spot like a normal human would do if trying to remember the place they left off in their book.

Mike leaned over Jessica's shoulder with a stupid grin plastered onto his face.

"A group of us are going to go down to La Push this weekend because the weather is supposed to be the greatest it has been in forever! Do you want to come with us?"

Mike looked like he was practically going to jump out of his skin because he was so excited. I looked back and forth between both Mike and Jessica. I shrugged my shoulders indifferently.

"I don't know. I'll have to ask Charlie."

I truly did not want to spend my weekend with anyone, especially Mike Newton. Mike's face had dropped drastically but Jessica's smile grew as she turned her face in the opposite direction as me. I looked at Mike and smiled apologetically.

"Can you ask him tonight and then tell me as soon as possible if you're coming?"

I smiled brighter.

"Of course!"

Just then the loud bell rang, telling the students lunch was over and it was time to get back to class. I jumped up gracefully and quickly and made my way towards my biology class. As I walked inside I smiled at the teacher and thanked him for allowing me to borrow one of the biology books during lunch and then took my assigned seat.

I folded my arms on the desk and laid my head down onto them, closing my eyes. I could hear the shuffling feet pass by me as other kids started to get into their seats, but I didn't hear his.

"Hello. I'm Edward Cullen. I don't think I have properly introduced myself to you yet."

His musical voice rang through my head so suddenly that I was almost startled. My eyes snapped open just in time to watch him swiftly take his seat and adjust it closer to me.

"You must be Bella Swan," he said smiling at me.

Wow! Way to go genius. I've only been sitting right next to you for what---around two months now and suddenly you decide to talk to me?

I covered my thoughts up with a fake sweet smile while I adjusted my self to a sitting position in my seat.

"Yes it is. It's very nice to meet you."

I held my hand out in a gesture for him to shake it but he looked at my hand warily, as if deciding whether or not he should touch me. A few emotions passed his face, confusion, frustration, and maybe even a bit of anger…?

I pulled my hand back quickly, startling him. I sent him a questioning glance but all he could do was give me an apologetic smile. Just then I heard the teachers' voice and I had then just realized that class had already begun. He was discussing about the lab we would be doing in the next few minutes with our lab partners.

The lab wasn't a challenge at all and it wasn't a challenge for Edward either. Both of us went back and forth with each other, handing each other the slides to put under the microscope momentarily glancing at the substance and naming each one of them. We finished the lab in a record ten minutes while everyone else was still trying to figure out the first slide.

After finishing the lab there was a long, awkward silence so I started to doodle all over my lab paper. After a minute I could feel his gaze on me and I had tried to ignore it at first but after a while it started to get onto my nerves.

My head snapped up towards him and my eyes met his. My eyes were hard and cold at first but as soon as I stared into his topaz eyes they started to give way and soften. His eyes looked like he was searching for answers to many unanswered questions, just staring and trying to figure things out. All I could was stare back quietly, not daring to move an inch.

"Ms. Swan, Mr. Cullen are you finished with your lab yet?'

The annoying, monotone voice of the teacher echoed all throughout my head. I reluctantly broke the gaze that had become so intense that it was unnerving and was about to answer when Edward's musical voice cut in.

"Yes, Sir."

"I hope you didn't do the whole lab yourself Mr. Cullen?"

He gave Edward a challenging look but Edward's smile just grew.

"Actually, she answered most of the questions."

The teacher grabbed our papers and started to read them carefully, searching for something wrong so he could point it out cheerfully. He then peered over the two papers casually to glare at us and with that, turned to assist the other students that were still having trouble on the lab.

I laughed a little and shook my head and heard Edward laughing quietly beside me as well. I looked over towards him; both of us had looks of disbelief on our faces.

I decided that there would never be another time better that this one, to start a conversation with him and try to become closer to him, because that's exactly what the Volturi wanted me to do.

Thinking of simple random questions at the moment seemed nearly impossible. What would a human sixteen-year-old teenage girl ask someone like Edward Cullen? Not like I would know what a sixteen-year-old would do. I had only been sixteen for three months before the Volturi decided to change me. While I was trying to form a coherent sentence in my head, his voice cut in.

"How do you like Forks so far compared to Florida?"

At that moment I was trying to recall everything I new about Florida but it was just so hard to think about anything for some reason.

"Oh, well it is nothing like sunny Florida" I said smiling.

"What was your favorite part about Florida?"

"The sun! I mean here there is absolutely no sunlight whatsoever! There's just tons and tons of rain clouds. There, however, it was so random. One day it could be pouring rain the next it could be hot as ever. It was just random all the time, so unexpected. I loved it."

I took in a huge breathe, realizing I hadn't stopped to breathe while I was talking. I had a huge smile on my face and it took a second for me to realize that everything I had just said, I had truly meant. The smile on my face grew even bigger. For some odd reason, it was easy to talk to him, unlike that Mike Newton kid.

He smiled back at me until he heard the bell ring and then he rose swiftly out of his chair and out the building. As close as I was supposed to get to know this family, I was afraid to get any closer. If there was one thing I had already learned, it was to not get to close with someone that was not part of the Volturi, because when you did, someone always got hurt.

**Okay, so here is the next chapter! YAY! Please REVIEW and feel free to ask me any questions and correct me if I was wrong on something! Last chapter I had a huge error and a couple of people reviewed it to me. THANK YOU SO MUCH! I really do appreciate it**

**-- Ditz4lyf**


	4. Chapter 4

After talking with Edward in Biology, the rest of the day at school passed by rather uneventfully. When the school bell rang to dismiss the kids from school, I quickly made my way home in the old truck Charlie had recently bought me. It was the slowest thing next to a slug. It pained me to see the old truck in the driveway and a huge smile on Charlie's face asking how much I liked it. I had to hold back some sly and sarcastic comment with a beautiful smile and a simple: "Oh gee, thanks! You shouldn't have." Charlie seemed to have been very pleased with my response because he chuckled a little and then handed me the keys. "All yours'," he said.

When I finally made it to the house, I unlocked the door with the spare key and stepped inside lazily. For the past couple of days I had started to feel weaker. I needed blood. I couldn't blow my cover up though by snatching some random person in this small town. It would become way too obvious to the other vampires, but I needed something immediately.

I laid my things on to the floor next to the sofa, and then plopped down onto it. I shut my eyes tightly and with my index fingers, I gently rubbed my temples. This was certainly complicating things. I started to roll my neck thinking of different possibilities.

A) I could run extremely fast to a town with an exceptional distance away from here and have plenty of time to make it before back home Charlie did.

or

B) I could simply not drink real blood, but go hunting in the woods for some random animals and drink their blood.

The only question with Plan B was whether or not the Cullen's would notice if I went hunting animals just like they did. I looked at the clock which read 2:55 p.m. Charlie would come home around 6:45. This gave me approximately four hours to do what ever I wanted to do.

Never before had I ever drank the blood of an animal and honestly, today was not the day I really wanted to try something different. I had been munching on human food for too long. It was time I actually ate something delightful. I smirked viciously as I went out through the back door and ran through the woods getting as far as possible from Forks.

I had arrived at the house later than I had expected, 7:23 to be exact but, luckily, Charlie was not home yet. As soon as I entered the house I ran upstairs to take a shower. If I had felt lethargic before this, I was overexcited now. I took a long shower, making sure that I had left no signs of the forest anywhere on me. After I was done showering, I dried off and put on some loose shirt and pajama bottoms.

I slowly made my way down stares to see Charlie watching a baseball game. I smiled and made my way to sit on the sofa. He looked up at me cheerfully and I looked back at him questioningly.

"I made something for you to eat tonight. Please try it. I know you usually do not eat a lot but I worked really hard at this."

I was completely full. I could not eat a single thing especially if it was going to be something that Charlie had made. He was never one of the best cooks in the world. I usually made dinner for Charlie but I had to much fun earlier in the afternoon.

"Actually Charlie, I was feeling really sick today so I just really didn't want to eat anything today."

He gave me one of his concerned glances. Ever since I started living with him, Charlie quickly picked up on my low appetite and was constantly trying to shove food down my throat every time he had the chance. Today was completely different though. I would feel unbelievably well for the next month or so, not having to eat anything else at all. Human meals could only hold my hunger for a short while, but when I drank human blood, it sustained me for an extremely long amount of time.

When it reached around 10:30 both Charlie and I said goodnight and made our ways to our bedrooms. I jumped onto my bed, leaning over to retrieve the book I had hidden under it, and then gracefully turned on the lamp next to my bed.

The house was quite and the time passed slowly. At night, my senses always seemed to become heightened, and I could hear, smell, and see everything. I could hear each raindrop hit the roof of the house. I could hear Charlie snoring in the room across the other side of the stairs. I could even feel the light vibrations coming from the footsteps of ants.

I started to feel uncomfortable. Something was out of place, or something was here that should not be. I began to rely on my senses to let me know what I thought was wrong but everything seemed to be in place inside the house. Was it outside the house?

I closed my book and went to turn the lamp off. As I turned it off my eyes carefully scanned the trees and yard. So far, everything looked normal. I was lying on my stomach with my hands underneath my pillow. I was just staring out my window, looking, listening, and waiting for something to happen because I knew something was.

I lowered my breathing slowly to the normal rate a human would have while they were sleeping. My senses where still more alert than ever and my eyes were searching for anything, a leaf, a broken twig, anything!

Just then, I felt very faint footsteps gracefully making there way to my window from the roof. Then I saw a figure at my window. He just sat there, looking inside. My eyes started to adjust so I could see his face. I gasped and he was startled. In the blink of an eye he disappeared from my window but I knew he was still outside my house.

He was the last person in the world I had expected to see near my house, let alone looking in through my bedroom window. I got up and walked over to my window. I opened it and felt the light raindrops rain on my skin. My eyes looked at the place where he had once been kneeling only a few seconds before. My eyes carefully scanned the area outside searching for him, only to find him at the very edge of the woods, cunningly camouflaged with his surroundings.

I couldn't stop looking at him and I whispered his name, and I knew that he could hear it. His head picked up into my direction. Before his eyes made contact with mine, I carefully moved myself out of the rain and closed my window. He was gone. I was going to have to be more careful from now on especially if I was going to have a visitor every once in a while.

I picked my book back up again and started to read. I didn't have to worry about paying any more attention to every little thing that was going around me for the rest of the night. I knew he wouldn't be back. The only question was, if he would be back tomorrow. I guess the only way I would know was at school.

I was almost completely done with my book when the alarm clock began to ring; bringing me back into the real world and making me get ready for school. I took a shower, ate, and changed into a very pretty outfit that allowed everyone to see how perfect my body was, and fit snuggly onto all of my curves.

I drove to school as fast as the car would allow me to and parked in the first free spot I found in the student parking lot. When I was getting out of the car I realized that the Cullen's had parked a few cars down from me, one row over. Leaning on the car door was no one other than Edward Cullen himself. I locked my car door and started heading in towards school.

I gave him a shy smile as I passed and before I knew it, he was walking right next to me keeping up easily with my pace.

"Do you need help with your things?"

I was holding one book in my hand and a bag on my shoulder. '_Oh, yes. I am so exhausted I don't think I will be able to even make it to first period with all this stuff_.' I looked up at him questioningly, trying to see if he was serious. His eager eyes stared back at me. Apparently he was.

I gave him a laugh and shook my head.

"What? You don't think I will make it to first period with _all_ of this _stuff_?"

We had both stopped walking because we had made it underneath the schools walkway. We were facing at each other, me looking up and him looking down because he was at least four inches taller.

"No. I just wanted to help."

With that he smoothly grabbed my book out of my hand and pulled the bag off of my shoulder smiling smoothly. Just then the bell rang to get to class and he gave me a gorgeous crooked smile. I completely forgot how to think.

"I guess I should take you to class."

He started to make his way into the direction of my first period walking gracefully and smoothly. I followed right behind him, easily keeping up with his pace. Before I knew it, he stopped and turned around causing me to almost run right into him. He gave me a crooked smile and passed me back my items.

I met his gaze and it looked so frustrated and at that moment I wanted more than ever to be able to understand what he was thinking. He suddenly turned around and walked away leaving me dumbfounded. I walked into the classroom and had every pair of eyes glued on me.

I shyly took my seat and said nothing the rest of the day until lunch. Mike of course was the first one to talk to me as I took my usual seat at the lunch table I always sat at.

"Did Charlie say you can go with us to La Push this weekend?"

I had not forgotten to ask Charlie about it because I simply did not plan on going no matter how good the weather was. Maybe I could drive all day and visit some place far away from Forks while Charlie went out fishing because I was about to go crazy with always seeing the same people.

"I asked him but he said he really didn't feel comfortable with the idea. It had something to do with me never being at La Push ever since I came here and he would feel more comfortable if I went there with him first, and then I could go with you guys there next time."

I pretended to put on an upset face and looked apologetically at him.

"I am really sorry. Maybe next time?"

"Yeah, maybe next time."

His face looked as if I had just completely ruined his whole entire day. If I actually liked Mike Newton, I might have cared but I really didn't like him. I was letting my eyes wonder around the school cafeteria until they settled onto the table at which the Cullen's sat at. I saw everyone but Edward sitting at the table and I knew I did not imagine him walking me to class today.

Jessica's voice cut in as sharp as a razor calling my name causing me to glare at her as I turned my head in her direction. When her gaze met mine her eyes widened for a moment and she readjusted her tone to a pleasant one although she barely hid the fact that she truly was livid.

" I just wanted to let you know that Edward Cullen is staring at you."

Her head slowly started to turn in the direction he was sitting in, motioning me to look that way and so I did. Our eyes met and he smiled and then winked at me playfully. I glared back at him showing him I was not interested in any childish games he might be thinking of playing. He motioned me with his index finger to come take a seat at the table that he was sitting at. Jessica looked at me questioningly.

"Maybe he is having trouble with his biology homework?"

I heard her let out some sort of disgusted snort as I rose from my seat and headed over to where Edward was sitting. I also did not miss the looks on his family members faces as I passed their table taking a seat next to Edward.

"You hungry?"

"No, are you?"

I looked at his lunch plate that was full of food that had not been touched and it would never be touched. He smiled smugly, "No I'm not hungry."

We both fell into an awkward silence as we both stared quietly into each other's eyes.

"How did you sleep last night." His voice carried some sort of undertone but I couldn't understand what it was. I was still glaring at him when I answered.

"I had a pretty rough last night."

"Did something scare you?"

"Something like that."

"What scared you?"

"How should I know?"

"You didn't see anything that spooked you?"

"No, why?"

"Just wondering."

Both of our eyes stared at one another, challenging each other in some secrete battle we had apparently engaged ourselves in. My eyes suddenly softened and I looked at him gently.

"How well did you sleep?"

He slightly grimaced. "I could always use more."

I smiled playfully and I could see his eyes eyeing me carefully. "Need help getting to sleep? I thought you were a big boy, seventeen years old right?"

Suddenly his eyes darkened slightly. "No I do not need help getting to sleep and yes I am seventeen."

I laughed quietly and now it was his turn to glare at me, which only caused me to laugh harder. His eyebrows knitted together thoughtfully for a couple of seconds.

"What is so funny to you?"

"Um…. I don't know. Your expressions?"

"My expressions?"

"Yeah, your expressions."

His eyebrows raised questioningly, his eyes carefully locking with my own. I couldn't stop from laughing again and I could make out vividly, his sister Rosalie glaring at me while the rest of the family watched me with mild interest. His face finally changed into his crooked smile, which was easily becoming my favorite smile.

I hadn't realized but we had both been leaning in towards each other. Both of us had become lost in our own little world until the bell rang. My eyes flickered away from his just for a second to look at the clock only for them to return back to his face, seeing him still smiling crookedly.

"Skip with me?" and with that we both left the building and headed towards his car.

**Okay, another chapter done. Please REVIEW! Thanks!**

**--Ditz4lyf**


	5. Chapter 5

The short walk to his car was a quite one. The minute we were in the parking lot and out of sight and hearing of everyone else in the school, the rain was pouring on us, and we ran human speed towards his car. He opened the door on the passengers' side for me and waited patiently for me to slide into the car before he gently shut the door and appeared at my side. His hair was in perfect disarray and his jacket was drenched. He slowly started to take it off, allowing me to see the long sleeve shirt that was hidden beneath it and his well-defined muscles. The black shirt hung tightly to his body allowing every contour of his body to be seen. Before I thought he had a chance to catch me staring at him with my mouth hanging open, I averted my eyes to look out the front window.

Once he was done taking off his jacket and situating himself in his seat, I could feel his eyes on me. I turned my attention back to him only to see him smirk. Yes, he did not miss me staring at him. I glared at him and then started to gaze out the window again. I could feel his gaze on me and it started to make me feel very uncomfortable. I pulled my hair over my shoulder to cover my face from his eyes and form some sort of protective shield around myself but I could still feel his burning gaze. The air in the car had become intense so I raced through my thoughts trying to create small talk.

"Umm...what do you think we were going to do in Biology class today?"

"Blood typing." It was not a question. It was a statement.

Suddenly, his hand flashed out of nowhere and gracefully twirled my hair around his finger and then placed it on my opposite shoulder, destroying the thin wall I had made between us.

"I guess it's a good thing I know my blood type then."

I turned back to face him and he smiled weakly but it didn't touch his eyes.

"What's wrong?"

Usually I asked this question with no genuine interest but this time, when I asked him, I truly did care. Not because the Volturi wanted me to be close to him and he was my only key in becoming close with the Cullen's, but because I was actually interested. I cared. I had spoken so fast and my thoughts came flooding through my head I had to place my index fingers on my temples and rub them. This was not good. It was never good to rely on your feelings when you had a certain objective you were trying to achieve. I had to get close enough, but not too close, but I feared that I had already made that mistake. Making sure my mind was where it needed to be, I opened my eyes again to see him quickly mask his face and answer my question.

"Nothing."

I looked at him questioningly and started to lean in closer but he pushed back away from me and gazed out the front window. It looked like it was going to be very quite for a while so I closed my eyes and leaned on the window. I started to let my thoughts run wildly through my head until I started to wonder about one thing in particular. What was Edward's power? I started to recall everything I had always thought was interesting. For example, the fact he knew exactly what we were supposed to be doing in Biology class and the fact that he could be in an intense conversation with someone about something, I would be eaves dropping, and the teacher would call on him for an answer to a question that not even I had heard; however, he answered the question without even a second to spare. I heard my intake of breathe as my eyes snapped open and my eyebrows raised in recognition.

"What are you thinking about?"

His voice sounded very concerned and I could not help but laugh uncontrollably. _You tell me_, I thought, _since that's what you're so good at_. I turned my attention towards him. He was leaning in towards me and his beautiful face was etched with concern.

"Tell me," I said, smiling sweetly, "How easy do you find it to figure out what people are thinking?" His face looked back at me cheerfully, supposedly grateful I was all right and that we where back into the questionnaire game we had left off at during lunch.

"Usually it is very easy."

"Then what am I thinking?"

He looked at me sadly for a moment, "I don't know," he admitted quietly. He looked down at his lap. He seemed like he truly was upset at the fact that he did not know what I was thinking. I gave him a confused smile.

"Why? I'm not that complicated now am I?"

He looked back up at me, his smile returning but the sadness still lingered in his eyes.

"I have no idea why but as for the complicated part, you are most definitely very complicated."

I pretended to be very upset. I looked at him angrily, and then turned my body completely around to face the side window so that my back was to him.

"Bella?"

I ignored him.

"Bella?"

A long silence was the response he was given.

Only after a minute he grabbed my jacket gently and started to shake it, causing me to rock backwards and forwards.

"Bella, are you mad at me?"

I couldn't hold it in any longer and I started to laugh. I turned back towards him. His face contorted with emotions of confusion and... anger?

"I was just kidding!"

I smiled playfully at him but he didn't return it.

"Hello! It was a joke! Ha ha!"

His face still looked like an angry statue and so I stared at him incredulously. Suddenly a small smile broke out on his face and he started laughing so hard it practically shook the whole entire car.

"I can not believe you just fell for your own joke!"

I wanted to be mad at him but I couldn't. Instead I started to laugh with him for the next ten minutes, both of us making fun of each other's faces. The rest of the school day was spent just like that. Both of us laughed, smiled, and bantered back and forth. Finally, when I had enough time to form a coherent sentence I smiled up at him.

"Look at us. We are acting like four year olds!"

His crooked smile found its way onto his face and his eyes stared at me, our gazes locked.

"Yeah well, you started it." We both started to laugh again. The end of the day bell rang in the background. It was quite and barely audible over our laughter. I sighed and looked outside. It had stopped raining but I still didn't want to leave school, because that meant I had to leave him. He starred at me warily and looked like he was about to say something but I cut him off.

"I have to go." I smiled apologetically and started to get out of the car but his voice stopped me. I turned my head back towards him. Our eyes locked again and we didn't have to say anything. After what felt like an eternity he gave me my favorite crooked smile.

"I will see you tomorrow."

He wasn't asking me a question. He wasn't asking me if I wanted to see him tomorrow; he just automatically assumed. He promised to see me tomorrow. Now, usually when someone promised me something, they never really did it. I had taught myself to never trust anyone no matter what but when he said that, I had to give him the chance. He hadn't asked me, he promised me and for some reason I believed him.

I smiled at him shyly.

"Okay. Wait for me in the morning."

His smile grew as he nodded his head. I could trust him. I believed that.

Once I got home, made dinner for Charlie and said goodnight; I thought. I didn't wonder aimlessly about random things this time, my thought actually had a purpose.

The Volturi had taught me to be strong. They taught me how to fight. They taught me how to be what I was- a vampire and they succeeded in every way. I had become the most destructive vampire ever. My power, my strength, and my mind made me perfect and even though I had everything I could ever want living with the Volturi, I wanted something more, something I knew I couldn't have their but I just couldn't find what.

The Volturi and the Cullen's where to completely different groups of vampires. They lived by completely different rules and standards. At the palace in Italy where the Volturi stayed, it was a constant battle to stay alive, to be number one, and to be someone worth wanting to be. The Cullen's however, seemed to be so close and friendly. They seemed so innocent.

The Volturi killed people for blood and lust. The Cullen's killed animals, because they didn't want to be a monster. They where trying to be as human as they possibly could and being with Edward, made me feel more human, more real, and more lively than I ever had before.

Usually, if I thought a vampire was running away from what they truly were and trying to behave more human, I would take that as a sign of weakness and laugh in their face. However; now I realized something, it takes a lot to do something like the Cullen's were doing. To abstain from human blood while interacting with them every day, having to fight the constant thirst and want, now that was a challenge and something worth recognizing.

I knew that he would come back tonight; the look in his eyes was all that I needed to determine that, so I fell into a fake slumber letting my human powers take over. It was never a real sleep, I knew that, because I was completely aware of everything that was going on around me, but it was more sleep than any other vampire was given and so I cherished it.

As I started to fall into my sleep, a sudden thought popped into my head, the mission, the Volturi and the Cullen's. The Cullen's still didn't know I was a vampire, but they where going to find out soon whether or not it was on purpose. The Volturi didn't know I was starting to form some sort of plan in my head and they weren't going to find it out what it was. This time the Volturi was not going to kill the only person I could get close to, because if I had to, I would kill them first.

**Okay here is Chapter 5! I was a little disappointed in the amount of reviews I got last chapter so lets change that. What did you like? What did you not like? DOES ANYONE think they know what's going to happen? Review and I will answer!**

**--Ditz4lyf**


	6. Chapter 6

The Night passed by slowly and quietly. The rain became a constant drizzle and its constant pitter-patter echoed through out the entire house. When he came, he was more careful and quite then he had been the night before. He stood at the window the whole night with the rain dripping off of him and his hair was in a beautiful mess. He left only five minutes before my alarm clock was set to go off disappearing mysteriously. Only then did I wake from my fake slumber.

His gaze had become unnerving during the middle of the night and it took every ounce of energy that I possibly had to not jump up and ask him to kindly stop staring. I was ready for school in a record twenty minutes and so I took my time getting to school although, once I got there, I still had fifteen minutes before school started.

Once I arrived at school, I parked a few cars down from the shiny Volvo that Edward owned. I made it out of the car gracefully, pulling my bag and books out with me. After I closed the door so I could make my way towards school, I stylishly turned straight into Edward who had once again, appeared out of thin air. I jumped back startled, my back slamming against the truck. I heard him sigh and then laugh a little. I glared at him.

"I told you I would see you in the morning."

He smiled his crooked smile and all I could do was smile back. Then I abruptly realized how close we were to one another. I would not be able to get around him without brushing against him and that was something I was trying to refrain from doing. I looked at him and he stared back at me.

"Umm… so are we going to head to class or were you planning on skipping the whole entire day today?"

Suddenly his gaze softened into a more thoughtful look as if he was actually considering skipping a whole day with me.

"What would you want to do the rest of the day?"

My mouth hung open as a gawked at him and then I shut it automatically as soon as I regained my composure.

"I don't know."

He smiled at me but there was a glint in his eye as if he found something amusing.

"Well maybe lets go to school today but you have to spend the whole entire day with me tomorrow."

Tomorrow? Did I have anything planned tomorrow? Tomorrow was the Saturday that Mike Newton and the other group of kids had decided to go and head down to La Push. Also, Charlie would be leaving earlier that morning to go fishing and he wouldn't be coming back until later that night. I smiled gleefully and unintentionally as I started to realize how beautifully planned this was becoming.

"Okay."

My voice sounded so cheerful and real that it sounded foreign to my own ears. His smile widened.

"When would you want me to pick you up? It's a Saturday so don't you want to sleep in?"

I pretended to think about it for a moment and he couldn't help but laugh.

"Nah! I think I can skip sleeping in."

His eyebrows rose in a questioning manner and his eyes looked as if they were challenging me.

"Are you sure you want to spend the whole entire day with me?"

"But of course!"

"You don't even know where I'm taking you. Don't you even care to find out?"

"Nope. I trust you."

Unexpectedly, my mouth clamped shut. The words had come out faster than I had time to comprehend them. The words rang through my head and ears and although I didn't want them to be true, I knew it was. Unpredictably a sudden surge of determination coursed through my body and my eyes burned with it. I looked him straight in the eyes, allowing our gazes to lock.

"You just invited me to do something with you so do not try and convince me to back out of the plans we just made. If you did not want to hang out with me, then you shouldn't have asked. As for the activity, surprise me. I love surprises!"

If I thought we were close to each other before, we had practically no space between us now. As I pushed by him, our sides touched and even through our clothes, the electricity that generated because of the touch coursed through my body.

"Come on, we're already going to be late for class."

He turned around slowly and his eyes gently gazed at me. He looked almost as if he was hurt and so I gently grabbed a piece of his jacket leading him through the rain towards the school as he silently dragged behind me. Once we finally made it under the schools' walkway, I turned around to face him. The pain in his eyes scared me. I gave him a confused look and he smiled sadly, which confused me even farther.

"What's wrong?"

He didn't say a word. Instead, he closed the gap between us, allowing only a few inches separating us apart. Slowly, his hand rose coming closer and closer to my face. I grabbed his arm gently but roughly, letting him know I was serious.

I could not allow him to touch me. Although I was as human as a vampire could ever be, I was still truly a vampire and not human. I had no pulse or beating heart. Allowing him to touch me would mean letting him know I was not human. Even though I was planning on telling him about what I truly was, I didn't want him to find out now and not like this. The look in his eyes was unbelievably painful. I could see vividly anger, confusion, and sadness and it took all of my will power to not break down in front of him. I had to be strong. I had always been strong before, but now, I had to be stronger than I had ever been because I had a feeling that from now on, life was only going to get tougher. I started to let my hold on his hand gently soften and rub up and down his arm smiling reassuringly.

"You're going to have to work your magic this time, Edward, because we are twenty minutes late and I have no idea what excuse I should give Mrs. Cope."

Although he smiled, it still did not replace the pain in his eyes but he led me through the office doors non-the less and worked his magic with Mrs. Cope. She gave us both passes and he thanked her, leading me out the front door.

He held the door open for me so elegantly; he would put any gentleman to shame. I smiled brightly up at him.

"Why thank you, Sir."

"My pleasure, Young Lady."

He smiled back down at me and the world froze for a moment. Why was this feeling so foreign to me and why did the Volturi never want me to feel like this? Usually I never questioned the Volturi or their motives, and in doing this everything always seemed to run smoothly, but now, I knew something was wrong and I needed to find out soon.

He walked me to my class and before I stepped inside he stared at me. I smiled shyly and before he had a chance to try and touch my hand or my face, I brushed the tips of my fingers quickly and lightly through his hair.

"I'll see you at lunch."

"Why can I not see you before lunch?"

"Fine. You can walk me to class."

"Can't wait, my Highness."

I glared at him for a second before I pushed him playfully.

"I'll see you after class then."

With that I turned into my classroom, giving the teacher my pass with everyone's eyes on me and took my usual seat. That's how the rest of my day went. Edward would meet me outside my class, walk me to the next one and talk to me for a few minutes, he would leave, and then as soon as I walked into the classroom, everyone had their eyes on me. I think I was getting even more attention then I was on the first day of school.

When the bell rang, dismissing students for lunch, I met Edward at the entrance to the class and he smiled. I walked towards him with a questioning gaze.

"Newton thinks we're going out."

His eyes were memorizing my face, trying to read my reaction. I smiled mischievously.

"Well then, what should I tell him when he asks about it?"

He looked thoughtful for a minute.

"I don't know. I'll allow you to decide when he asks you."

I glared at him and he just laughed.

"Let's go to lunch. If we don't go everyone will start getting suspicious and we will be having the whole entire student body asking if we're going out and not just Mike Newton."

As we were waiting in line, everyone constantly looked into our direction and then would lean over into someone's ear and whisper something. I rolled my eyes dramatically. Everyone was trying to be secretive and hold in his or her curiosity but they where nothing less then plain obvious. Edward noticed what I was watching and started to laugh causing the people standing next to us in line to give us looks. Making our way to our lunch table I caught a glimpse of Edwards' family staring at him. Well, everyone was staring at him for the exception of the beloved Rosalie. I stared back at her and our eyes locked. I could feel her hatred for me rolling off in huge tidal waves. I had to suppress my laughter. Edward noticed our staring game and immediately turned around to glare at Rosalie and the rest of his family. As soon as he did, all of their eyes flashed in different directions. I sat down and met his gaze. He smiled apologetically.

"I'm sorry; they're just a bit worried."

"They're worried about what?"

He hesitated and averted his eyes to the wall trying to not make any eye contact at all.

"I usually never talk to anyone outside of my family much less hang out with them so openly in front of people like I am with you."

"Why not?"

Again he hesitated. This time, I could tell, most of what he was going to say would be a lie. He wasn't going to say "_well you see, I am a vampire and I could kill you at any second. It's really not a good idea to hang around humans that much, you know, just in case_." I started to laugh a little and he looked at me crazily, which only made me laugh even harder.

"Sorry, I just had a thought."

"What were you thinking about?"

"No, this time I will not tell you so do not even try! Now back to you. Why do you usually not hang out with anyone?"

"I never really hang out with anyone because I have my family and they are my best friends. I don't need anyone else."

What he had said actually hurt and it took all of my composure to cleverly mask the pain that ran through my eyes for a split second. When our eyes finally found each other again, I could see something in his eyes but I was unsure of what it was and so I looked back down to my plate of uneaten cafeteria food.

"You never really seem to have an appetite."

A wicked smile appeared on my face.

"Oh trust me I do, but when it comes to cafeteria food, I most certainly can pass."

"You should eat a little you know. It's not healthy to skip meals."

"Thanks but no thanks. I can take care of myself."

"You know food helps you think in class and can help improve your likelihood of finding the correct answer."

"Do as you speak, Edward Cullen, and you most certainly do not eat your food either."

I looked at him incredulously for a moment and then chose to ignore him by taking the plate of uneaten food and dumping it into the trash. As I resumed my seat I smiled challengingly.

"After everything I just told you, you chose to ignore me."

"Hmm, let me think. Yes! You ignore your own advice as well."

He rolled his eyes at me and stared at me disbelievingly.

"You are stubborn."

"Yes, I know. Thank you."

He laughed a little before he picked up my book from the table and started to flip through the pages.

"Is this book any good?"

I laughed and rolled my eyes at him.

"Every book becomes amazingly good when you have classes that go above and beyond passing the snore meter."

He gave a hard laugh and looked at me boldly.

"You, Bella Swan, have a way with words when it comes to description."

I smiled shyly averting our eye contact. I heard him sigh and get up from his seat.

"Let's go or else we are going to be late."

I rose from my seat obediently, finally taking in the view of the empty cafeteria. He took my book with him so I followed him out of the cafeteria and into our classroom quietly and quickly.

"I read the book before. It's one of my favorites."

He was looking at the book dreamily and I was afraid that if I went to reach for the book, he wouldn't even notice. I touched his arm lightly bringing him back into reality. He turned his face towards me with a small smile. I smiled back and squeezed his arm reassuringly. He nodded his head and looked away.

All during biology I sat quietly next to him because he began to read my book intently. After class he asked me if he could keep it until the end of the day so he could finish it. I laughed at him. He had literally completed more than half the book in less than one hour. He would only need another period to finish the book in its entirety and probably still have enough time to write me a three page book report about it in great detail. I allowed him to keep the book until the end of the day.

After my last hour, Edward walked me to my car. He was jubilant about the fact he had finished the book and was engaging me in a thoughtful discussion about one of the characters; constantly asking me about his thoughts and actions and what I agreed with and disagreed with. He always seemed pleased and surprised by my responses and apparently unknowing to the fact that the book was also one of my favorite and that I had read it backwards and forwards at least a million different times.

When we reached my car he was smiling like a four year old child who had just received a piece of candy and had no idea what to do because he was so happy. His crooked smile showed no signs of leaving his face at all and it surprised me at how excited he could get over such an inconsequential matter.

He told me he would pick me up at eight in the morning and I agreed knowing that Charlie would leave the house a long time in advanced. Once my car was unlocked, he opened the door for me smiling foolishly. "For you, my Lady," and then passed me my book and bag once I was in my seat. After he backed away from the car I pulled out to leave school but he didn't move at all. He just watched me leave with an insecure look in his eye.

I walked into the house sighing heavily when I read the note that was on the kitchen table. It was from Charlie telling me that he was going to be home really late and to eat dinner without him. He wouldn't come home until around nine thirty or ten.

Suddenly the phone rang. I walked to the phone lazily and answered it.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Bella," Aro's cheerful voice ran through my ears and my eyes snapped open.

I knew what to do. I had been trained for a couple of years while I was with the Volturi, and I knew to act as if I was having a normal conversation with anyone on the phone. No names were to be said, no exact locations, no nothing. Even if no one was around me, it was a safety precaution. She had received calls a couple of times before when I had missions, but the only times they had ever called me was for a serious matter.

"How do you like your new schoolmates?"

"They're okay."

"We miss you here, Bella, and we want you to come back soon. We have a little something we want you to do."

"What do you want?"

When I heard his reply I almost dropped the phone. My body became a statue and I was using every ounce of energy I had so restrain the snarl that wanted to rip from my chest.

"Bella, you heard me right?"

I still couldn't speak. If I did, I would say something I would regret. My eyes were filled with hatred and disgust and I could feel the venom pour out of my teeth and into my mouth.

"Bella, you will do it. It's something you have done before so don't act surprised. It's who you are. It's what you are good for. It comes so natural for you. Do not deny yourself your right to be yourself. You're an amazing creature, Bella, a prodigy in every way. You're something so special others would kill to have the power you have. Do it Bella or I will find someone that will."

What should she trust? Her gut feeling or the creature she has become. Should she trust her heart or the monster that has been waiting so long for this type of mission that it is just dieing to come out? She had been waiting for a mission like this for a long time, a mission that would test her strength, speed, and power to its fullest potential. A million different thoughts raced through her head and she smiled sadistically.

"No, I'll do it."

**All right so I finished another chapter! I was very pleased with the reviews that came in with the last chapter. PLEASE KEEP UP THE REVIEWS. Last chapter I had 19. Let us see if we can keep that amount and maybe go beyond…?**

**Tell me what you liked, what you did not like and what you would like to see more or less of. Remember critiquing is always awesome to read as long as it comes across politely. If it's degrading to someone's story, then I suggest you just stop reading it. Reviews also help with self-esteem issues because I think my writing is absolutely horrible. My friends think otherwise and asked my to post my stories up here to see the type of reviews I receive.**

**Hope you all enjoyed!**

**---ditz4lyf**


	7. Chapter 7

I wasn't able to hear his reply on the phone. My icy blue eyes started to lighten. My senses started to sharpen and became more alert. My teeth started to sharpen as the venom began to pour into my mouth. I was trying to control the monster that was trying to consume my body but I couldn't. I walked fluidly out the back door fully alert about everything around me. I wasn't thirsty at all but I needed to do something to control myself, a deviation from every thought that was going through my head.

I ran faster than I ever had before and with each passing second, my senses became even more heightened. My speed constantly began to increase. I ran four times as far as I had the previous killing, the killing that was not fast at all. I took my time and at the very end, before I decided that I wanted to kill, the kid felt like he had died in hell by Satan himself and that the real hell would, in fact, actually become a paradise compared to what he just went through.

I arrived at the house earlier than expected. When I had walked inside, I took a shower and cleaned the blood off of the sides of my mouth. Once I was out of the shower, I changed into a baggy shirt and boxer shorts. I had a lot on my mind that I needed to think about but I really didn't want to think about them, life was getting more and more complicated as it was getting more and more interesting. Thinking about things, at this point, would only make what I was about to do tomorrow complex.

I woke up when I heard Charlie leave early in the morning to go fishing and I forced myself to go back to sleep. My senses were still sharp and it was becoming difficult to overcome the monster I was and if anyone of the Cullen's were having the problem that I was having, they would have let all chaos brake through. Thankfully, I naturally came across as a human, so I didn't have to try to hard to cover anything.

I woke up again when I heard the car pull up into the driveway. My eyes snapped open and scanned the room to find the alarm clock flashing 8:00 a.m. in my face. I groaned as I rose out of the bed. Within a blink of an eye, I was fully dressed.

I looked at my reflection in the mirror as I felt the lightest vibrations coming from his footsteps as he made his way towards the front door. My hair was slightly wavy; a perfect disaster with the sunny highlights streaming through my hair.

My eyes were lighter than they had ever been, the only thing that ever changed when I allowed my senses to reach their fullest potential. His soft knocks on the door echoed through my head and my head snapped into the direction of the door. I walked down the stairs at human speed and quickly opened the door.

I had tried to avoid eye contact with him but as soon as I opened the door, our eyes locked like an unwanted habit. I saw his crooked smile plastered on his face and I resisted the urge to gag.

The only time I had ever been this alert, was the time I had became a vampire. Aro had taught me how to control it and lessen the intensity. I wondered if I was going to ever be able to control my senses as well as I could now if things went out of control.

I saw him start to take a step forward but my voice stunned him.

"Let's go."

My voice resembled the ice on a glacier, both freezing cold and extremely dangerous. It sounded so foreign to my ears from the cherry voice I had carried everyday at school and he almost jumped back. A look of concern was embedded all over his body, paralyzing him in my doorway so I had to push by him to exit.

This time, when our bodies slightly collided, there was no electricity that flowed between us; there was only tons of tension that floated in the air. I made my way toward his car and I heard his feet slowly making their way to the location I stood at.

He opened the door for me and I slid in and watched him make his way to his seat with a careful eye. Once he was in the car, he started to drive casually. The car ride was long and silent. One minute his eyes would be intently staring on the road and the next his eyes would lay softly on my tense form, debating whether or not to ask me what was wrong.

He turned onto a rocky road and the car shook up and down. The sound of the rocks hitting the car, pounded violently through my head. Soon enough the car stopped in front of an unmarked path. He opened the door for me and I rose out of my seat swiftly, making sure to avoid his gaze completely. He shut the door behind me quietly.

I started to walk forward but his arm was around my waist in a heartbeat and he pushed me onto the car door. My senses instantly became even more alert and my eyes glared at him questioningly.

"Bella, what's wrong?"

His voice was slightly shaky and I could smell the nervousness as it rolled off him. I focused on my voice and demeanor to become the way it usually was when I was at school or having a conversation with him in his car while we would skip class. It killed my face to put on a good fake smile as I connected my eyes with his. I put my hand on his shoulder and squeezed it lightly.

"Nothing. I'm fine."

My voice was a perfect replication of the way it usually was in school. I was about to remove myself from off the car door but his hand landed on my hip, slightly underneath my shirt, and almost touching my skin.

I went to push his hand down off of me but his had refused to move. My eyes had been glued to his hand that rested on my hip with pure disgust so I turned my eyes onto his face. His eyes pleaded with mine in a childish way begging for a truthful answer. My cold eyes only became colder and his hand became even harder and tighter.

As his hold tightened, his eyes pleaded even more. Minutes passed like that until I realized I had to give in because I knew he was not planning on doing so. My eyes softened and his hold began to slacken. I gave him one of my smiles and his hand slipped off of my hip. I pushed him gently off of me and as he walked backwards with my hands on his hips, I walked forwards.

"So what did you have planned for today?"

His crooked smile flashed on his face.

"Hiking. I hope you're up for that."

I gave him a lighthearted laugh and he glared at me.

"I'm always up for a challenge."

He laced one of his fingers through my belt loop and led me onto the path. The smell of the forest was nauseating. I could smell, hear, and feel the vibrations of everything in the forest causing my head to spin.

Edward walked in front of me, constantly looking behind him to see how I was doing. Every time he offered to hold my hand to help me up, I kindly declined him. In doing so, I received a hard glare so I would push him and laugh playfully and would take the lead through the forest. He would, then, walk up casually behind me and snake his arm around my waist and bring me back behind him. We hiked for a while and I could see a clearing far in the distance. I could feel Edward become more and more tense with each step he took as soon as he saw the clearing as well.

When we reached the clearing, Edward stopped before the sun could lightly brush against his skin. The clearing was a gorgeous meadow that brightened and glowed with the beautiful sunrays. I walked out into the meadow with my face directed towards the sun and spun in a couple of circles as I took in the rays of light and warmth. I brought my hand towards him and he smiled at me sadly.

"I really should have told you something before I brought you here."

I smiled curiously.

"What's that?"

He seemed to be choosing his words carefully and was taking to long to answer and I was started to become agitated. I decided that time was up, the little game I was playing with him earlier was over, and it was time I started the very thing I agreed to accomplish.

"You're not human."

His eyes pinned me down and he stared at me in disbelief.

"You're a vampire."

My icy tone from earlier this morning pierced his ears as I said the word "vampire" and he became alert, instantly tensing. I smiled flashing my teeth at him. He walked into the sun, his skin sparkling all over like he was covered in diamonds. His hand reached to grab my hand and this time I allowed him to hold it. He gently held my hand trying to feel a pulse but there was none and his breathing began to deepen. He looked at me and I smiled.

"You knew…"

"The whole time." I finished his question sarcastically as I rolled my eyes.

He was confused, not being able to understand anything at all. His hand reached to gently brush against my lips. As his fingers traced my lips I started to talk but no words came out my mouth. I couldn't allow him to do this to me, to have this affect on me. I could hardly form a sentence in my head. His free hand snaked around my waist and the hand that had been tracing my lips slid behind my neck. Gently he started to pull me closer as he began to lean towards me. I couldn't let him do this or else I would never want to go back to the Volturi.

"I need Carlisle."

My voice was icy cold and his eyes snapped open as soon as he heard my demand.

"What?"

My eyes were not locked with his but staring at a tree that was directly behind him. He brought my face to his, our foreheads touching slightly. His hold was tight and I was stiff and tense trying not to do anything I would regret too much.

"Why are you here?"

With that, I smiled weakly. The long pause was all he needed for confirmation and a growl ripped from his chest violently. He didn't let go of me though; he just kept pulling me closer and closer. His hold had become almost painful. My hands were on his chest. Part of me wanted to push him away while the other half wanted to wrap themselves around his neck.

He brought his nose to my neck and took a deep breath. I turned my face towards his as his face moved deeper and deeper into the crook of my neck, taking deep breaths. Slowly, my senses started to settle down, allowing me to take full control over my body and I melted into his arms. Without them around me, I would have fallen flat on my face.

"Even though I don't have a heartbeat, I still have a scent. It's part of my power."

His voice was muffled as his lips moved, brushing lightly against the side of my neck.

"Is that your power? The ability to seem human?"

"Well, that's part of it. My senses are also superior to every other vampire."

His nose was trailing up and down the side of my neck, occasionally moving up to my jaw. My thoughts were scattered across my mind, unlike my usual collected thoughts. I stood still, trying to concentrate on standing.

"You're with the Volturi. Why?"

I laughed sadly my eyes filmed over with water.

"They changed me. They taught me how to control what I am. They took me into their family and taught me how to be a part of it. They're my friends, my family."

He laughed sadly and sarcastically and his breath rained along my neck.

"You mean they learned how to control you. Bella, don't you see; they have learned how to trigger certain things you do. They learned how to manipulate your senses to control you, instead of allowing you to choose when you want to use them. They didn't teach you to control your power; they learned how to take advantage of you."

Even though I hated what he just said and I wanted to hurt him for saying it, I knew what he said was right. My breathing started to deepen as sobs escaped my lips and I fell onto the floor. He was instantly at my side, my head between his hands as he gazed into my eyes.

After he calmed me down by holding me and humming a tune I had never heard before in my ear, he started to talk to me again.

"I want you to come to my house. I want to take you to my family."

"They knew that you were coming here with me today? Aren't you supposed to keep the secrete of what you are, a secrete? Do you not know the definition of it? You and your family are amazing! Deliberately breaking the rule and why, because you were bored and wanted to have a little fun. You're crazy."

After I was finished with my short tantrum, he laughed long and hard. I glared at him and he rolled his eyes at me.

"Are you done yet?"

I punched him and he made a surprised face as he held his harm in a hurting manner.

"That was completely uncalled for."

I punched him on the other side and he punched me back. At first, we were just trying to punch each other, but we soon started to wrestle both of us becoming more and more aggressive. The rest of the time we spent in the meadow, we did just that. Finally, when the sun started to set I sat in the middle of the meadow in the grass. He sat beside me, his back facing the direction I was so it was easier to look at my face.

"I wasn't lying to you when I said that I wanted you to come to my house."

"Honestly, I don't want to go."

"Bella, I know you're scared but we can help you."

My eyes glared at him and he tensed a little bit, unsure if he had went to far and if he had triggered something off in me again. I rolled my eyes and he relaxed knowing that everything was fine.

"I'm not scared but honestly, Edward, think about it. If I go to your house, the likely hood of my senses controlling me again is almost a hundred percent. It was hard enough for me to fight it this afternoon but imagine how hard it would be to stop if the very target I have been searching for is standing right in front of me? How do you expect me to stop then? It's too dangerous and I am not going to try and endanger your family on purpose. I almost already hurt you. I don't want something like that to happen again."

"Bella, what do you want to do?"

My eyes met his questioningly, unsure of what he meant by the question. He smiled his crooked smile but it didn't touch his eyes at all.

"Do you want to stay with the Volturi or with my family and I?"

My breath was caught in my throat and my body transformed into a statue, my eyes glued on his. His eyes were sad; unsure of the path I would choose. Could I choose someone I barely even new but felt so comfortable with over the people I had never doubted before, until this very moment. Could I really get over the Volturi that quickly? Did they make a mistake and accidentally didn't tell me something, although I'm sure they meant to. I couldn't answer him truthfully. I couldn't even answer my own questions, how was I supposed to answer his? His eyes darkened and he looked away his face contorted with anger.

"They don't care about you, Bella. They just like to control you."

"Maybe they made a mistake. They probably meant to tell me something but they just forgot. They have never done anything purposefully to hurt me before so why would they do something now?"

His eyes turned back to mine, his face becoming even angrier than before. His eyes were cold and I wondered what I had said to make him so angry.

"They hurt you before?"

My eyes glazed over. That wasn't exactly the topic of conversation I wanted to be on. I shook my head and he tensed up. He understood that I didn't want to talk about it and he wasn't going to push me into telling him.

"If they hurt you before, what makes you think that they wouldn't hurt you again?"

"Edward, everyone gets hurt by other people. It doesn't matter if they're family, your best friend, or someone you have never met before! Somewhere along the road, you're going to get hurt by one of them and you just have to learn how to forgive and forget."

As I talked to him, his face softened and he slowly started to relax. His hand reached out and held my hand squeezing it lightly. His eyes where curious, desperately wanting to understand what the Volturi could have done to me to make me feel that way.

"You still truly don't forgive them do you? You just constantly tell yourself you do because you don't know how else to deal with the situation."

"So know you're my psychiatrist?"

He glared at me and I immediately regretted what I had said.

"Sorry, I didn't mean that."

I started to turn my face away from him but his free hand took my face in his hand and turned it towards him, his thumb gently running across my lips. My eyes gently shut and I ignored the urge to shiver under his touch. I groaned inwardly wondering why life had suddenly become so difficult. It had been too easy before.

When I opened my eyes his face was right next to mine. As he moved closer my body automatically moved back. His hand started to pull me towards him but I couldn't let him pull me any closer. I shut my eyes and whispered to him.

"I can't."

My voice shook and I was nervous. I had too many things on my mind now; I couldn't start worrying about him as well. He looked thoughtful for a moment before he chose to respond.

"You won't ever be able to, or just not now?"

He still hadn't moved away from me and it was hard for me to even think of what I really wanted.

"No, just not now."

I could feel him smile and his happiness rolled off of him breaking the tension that had formed between us.

"I'll wait until you're ready then."

It was my turn to smile and I laughed a little shaking my head.

"Do you promise me?" He asked quietly.

I wasn't exactly sure what he wanted me to promise but I had a pretty good idea. He wanted me to let him know when I would be okay to be with him. I smiled even wider.

"I promise."

He leaned in and kissed the crook of my neck and pulled away. He rose off the grass and offered his hand to me. He smiled at me reassuringly.

"Can I take you to my house?"

I looked worried and he brushed his fingers against my check smiling slightly.

"I won't let anything happen to you. I promise. Plus, my family will be excited to meet you finally. "

My eyes closed for a moment, thinking, and I shook my head approvingly, smiling lightly.

"I'll go."

**I was so excited with the reviews I received last chapter. Let's keep it up. What did you think about this chapter? I fixed the previous chapters and that's why it took so long to update but I hope it was worth it. ****REVIEW PLEASE!**

**Oh and has anyone read the first chapter of Eclipse in the special edition of New Moon yet? If you have tell me how it is! D**

**--Ditz4lyf**


	8. Chapter 8

I took his hand and rose from the ground shakily. I wasn't sure that going to his house was the best idea that he could have come up with but he had seemed pretty intent on making go with him there. He started to walk in front of me and turned around casually to send me a wicked smile. There was a glint in his eye that I had never seen before and suddenly, he let go of my hand, quickly disappearing. I rolled my eyes and laughed light heartedly. He could not beat me at running even on his best day. I took off; following the same path he had taken me on when we walked up to the meadow. I ran passed him and I could hear him laughing softly. When I made it back to his car, I leaned on the passenger's side waiting for him to catch up. I was trying not to think about what we were about to do and I didn't know how well his family was going to handle everything. When he finally made it to the car, I looked at him shyly as he came towards me to open my door. Once he made it into his seat and took off down the road he looked over toward me taking my hand in his in an effort to calm me down; however, he was not successful.

"What will your family say when you bring me to your house? Are you sure it's going to be fine with them?"

My hands quickly became shaky as I became even more concerned and so I started to twirl my hair around my finger while my legs shook. He laughed slightly and squeezed my hand even harder.

"I told them I was planning on taking you to our house so you could meet them soon. Well, after you knew what we truly are and if you were fine with it. "

His smile widened as my eyes finally met his. He stared at me for a couple of moments letting his words sink in. My legs didn't stop shaking, and my finger wouldn't stop twirling my hair. I looked back out onto the road and I heard him sigh quietly.

"You know, if you really don't want to go right now, I am not making you. I just thought that it would be a really good idea if you would come and I also really wanted you to meet them."

He started to look away sadly but when I squeezed his hand tighter, his eyes turned to mine again. We just stared at each other letting the time come to a complete stop, completely ignoring the road and our surroundings.

"You know, as long as you stay near me, I can always protect you."

I rolled my eyes sadly. He didn't understand the mess I was starting to bring him and his family into. They couldn't protect me from the Volturi, or even more, they couldn't stop me from me. They couldn't even save themselves. If I wanted to, I could destroy them all in just a few seconds.

"I don't need protection from other vampires, Edward, I need help from myself. What if I get to out of control? Do you realize the damage I could create? I don't want that to happen."

His eyes saddened as he pulled up onto a road that was covered by trees. I could make out a beautiful house as we made our way toward it and I instantly realized that this was his home.

"I'll always help you with that and now my family will too. It's going to be fine."

When the car came to a stop, I stiffened. Edward turned completely around in his seat to stare at me. When I felt his gaze on me, I turned towards him, concern etched onto every part of my face. He smiled at me and I shook my head in disbelief.

"Let's get this over with before I change my mind."

I quickly exited the car and walked to the front of it, tapping my foot in nervousness. I felt his strong arms wrap around my waist from behind me and pull me into an iron hold. His lips were on my neck and I leaned into his touch.

I started to wonder; maybe I could control myself, if I knew that I could be with him like this, forever, then maybe I could chose to stay with him and his family. Maybe it wouldn't actually be so hard.

My arms wrapped around his and my head turned towards him, our lips slightly touching. I didn't really know what was going on but then again I didn't really care. Everything felt so right at that moment, something that I hadn't felt in a long time. I felt his lips about to slide over mine and my head turned back in the other direction. He sighed heavily but let his lips slightly trail up and down my neck.

I turned my body completely around to face him and he pulled his lips away from my neck and smiled at me. He tugged at my hand and brought me to the door of his house. When he opened the door my body instantly froze. He turned to glance at me. He let go of my hind so he wouldn't rush me and walked through the door, and took a couple of steps into it. He called his family members names quietly.

They all quickly appeared, for the exception of Carlisle and my body relaxed a little. I saw Rosalie and Emmett standing in the stairwell. Alice came from the left side of the house with Jasper right behind her. There was another women that I had never seen before. I assumed that it was Esme, the mother. Charlie had told me about her once or twice but never told me much about her.

Edward turned back towards me and held out his hand, motioning me to come to him. I didn't and he looked at me stubbornly. He continued to stare at me, his eyes begging me to come to him and I huffed as I pulled myself through the front door and towards him. I took his hand in mine once I made my way to his side never wanting to let go.

He smiled and he pointed to each member of the family saying there names out loud for me as if I needed clarification about who they were. Rosalie, Emmett, Alice, Jasper, and Esme. I smiled at each one of them. He then looked at them, a huge smile on his face.

"This is Bella."

Esme walked towards me with a huge smile on her face. She extended her hand towards me and I looked at Edward. He smiled and nodded his head encouragingly and I took her hand, shaking it lightly.

Her smiled began to falter and her eyes began to flicker towards Edward. He took his hand and intertwined our fingers together tightly and reassuringly. She finally understood and her bright smile returned onto her face gleefully.

"It's so good to have you here."

I smiled as she released my hand and I turned to face Edward but Alice pushed herself between the two of us. She threw her hands around me as she laughed excitedly. When she pulled back her smile continued to grow even wider. Her eyes, like Esme's, flashed towards Edward and he continued to smile brightly. She squealed excitedly almost forcing me to cover my ears.

"It's nice to finally meet you. I've been waiting for so long."

"It's nice to meet you too."

Jasper had started to come closer and now he stood directly behind Alice. He smiled at me and I smiled back. I was getting nervous again and so I started to twirl my hair. I looked down at the floor nervously and tapped my foot. Jasper smile widened and he came towards me, embracing me in his arms. As soon as he touched me, I felt calm again. I was so surprised that it took me a while to finally wrap my arms around him. It had seemed more like Alice's nature to do something like that, but it was completely unexpected coming from Jasper.

I saw Emmett run towards me and I shut my eyes. His size was so massive; I wasn't sure how graceful his stop would be. I felt his arms around me and he picked me up and twirled me around. When he put me down, Edward glared at him but he smiled back innocently. Rosalie never came towards me and Edward let out a low hiss towards her.

I punched him lightly in the shoulder and his eyes redirected themselves back to me. He smiled childishly and I shook my head at him disapprovingly. I knew Rosalie didn't like me, the last thing I needed was for her to feel like she was being forced to be near me. I was actually content with not being anywhere near her, we shared the same amount of dislike for each other openly. I heard Emmett laugh as he started to double over with laughter.

"You just met the girl and she's practically got you whipped."

If looks could kill, Emmett would have been killed four times over. Everyone glared at him, for the exception of Rosalie who vanished immediately after we were finished with our introductions. My eyes started to wander around the house as everyone else was taking my form in while they had quite discussions amongst themselves.

"Esme, when is Carlisle going to come home?"

"In an hour or two. Why? Is there a problem? Does he need to come home immediately?"

Esme's voice answered Edwards question curiously.

My eyes snapped towards her quickly, my body tensing completely and my nervousness hitting me like a freight train. Her look, and everyone else's, became worried and on edge.

"Can we go to the living room? We have a lot we are all going to have to talk about."

Esme came toward me and took my hand hurriedly, ushering me into the living room. She sat me on the couch and Edward sat besides me. When everyone was in the room and comfortably seated, Edward looked at me questioningly. I shook my head no. I just met his family. I definitely did not feel comfortable telling them anything right now, especially the part about the Volturi.

I had never been ashamed about the Volturi before but now I was ashamed to tell them about who I was. I looked down towards the floor. My senses started to heighten, something that naturally happened when I became nervous. Edward started to speak and I started to feel very uncomfortable.

"Bella was sent here by the Volturi. They want Carlisle and they have asked her to bring him to them. They use her exceptionally strong powers to their advantage; controlling her to do the tasks they want her to do. She's nervous. She doesn't know how she will react when she sees Carlisle. I think she'll be okay with some help but it's not something I can be certain about."

"What are her powers?"

Emmett's voice didn't seem upset. It was curious and a little bit cautious. Edward's voice was steady, completely sure of himself. He wasn't worried about what his family might think, as far as he cared, he only wanted to help me.

"Her senses are amazingly queen. Everything about her is magnified greatly, compared to every other vampire. The reason why we couldn't tell she was a vampire, is because her powers also allow her to come across more human. She doesn't glitter in the sun like us or anything like that."

"Bella, why does the Volturi want Carlisle?"

Esme's voice was full of concern. I didn't take my eyes off of the floor and I answered her. I didn't want to see the concern and fear that would be in her eyes. Edward's thumb ran gentle circles on my hand as he tightened his hold on it.

"I don't know. They wanted him soon though."

"When do you think they will start getting nervous and try to contact you again?"

Emmett's voice was soft but full of urgency. I finally lifted my eyes off of the ground to meet his gaze. I didn't want to look nervous in front of them. I had learned it was a sign of weakness, and I was not allowed to show weakness at all. I flashed my beautiful white teeth at him.

"I never take longer than a couple of days. The longest it ever took me to bring someone to the Volturi was two and a half days. It's not hard for me. The Volturi contacted me yesterday after school. They'll start to worry soon. They won't call me though, that's too risky. They'll send someone here to check up on me, to see if the reason I haven't brought Carlisle back is because something major is keeping me from doing so and not my own personal will."

Everyone was silent, their eyes resting intently on me. Emmett and I stared each other straight in the eye, never breaking contact. His eyes were soft and I'm sure my eyes looked overwhelmed. Edward was sitting silently beside me. I let go of his hand and closed my eyes rubbing my temples in a constant rhythm. As I became more stressed, it became more difficult to keep myself in control of my body. I felt a wave of calm start to flood around me. It helped little by little allowing my body to relax into the couch.

I heard the family discussing certain precautions that they should take. They wanted me to stay with them for the weekend to see how things went. I wanted to protest but I was trying too hard to relax myself that I couldn't talk. I heard Alice call Charlie on the phone and ask him if I could stay for the weekend. Apparently, Charlie was excited to hear that I had made friends and agreed eagerly. I finally opened my eyes when I heard a car pulling up.

The waves of calmness started to strengthen as I slowly began to tense again. Edward stood to sit on the floor facing me, taking my face in between his hands. He forced me to look him straight in the eye. I felt Jasper and Alice sit next to me. Alice had a hand drawing circles on my back and Jasper asking me how I felt.

I tried to answer him but my mouth was clamped shut, venom slowly starting to pool in my mouth. My hands started to shake and I heard Edward whispering a string of profanities. When the front door opened, my body froze into a complete statue. My hearing instantly became better, my eyes could see clearer, and I could feel the footsteps of an ant crawling on the kitchen counter.

"Bella?"

Edwards' voice pounded through my head and my hands were clenched at my sides. My eyebrows came together and my eyes slowly became lighter. I could feel my senses winning over my body slowly and I hated myself because of it. My mind was quickly trying to calculate the different things I could do in order to prevent myself from hurting anyone.

I stiffened when I felt Edwards face move up towards mine. He stared into my eyes calmly and then pushed his nose into the side of my neck. He was whispering to me softly but I was concentrating too much on keeping myself in control before I hurt someone to understand what he was saying. His cool breath ran smoothly down my neck and at that moment all the adrenaline stopped, the only thing I could do was listen intently as the front door opened.

I felt a cool hand on my face and cool hands rubbing my back gently. I slowly unclenched my hands and let them shake in front of me. Two hands held mine gently as light kisses rained along my neck and collarbone. After a moment Edward pulled away from my neck to stare back into my eyes. His eyes were filled with determination and once he saw the color of my eyes, he smiled triumphantly. I shut my eyes tightly and felt Carlisle making his way into the living room were Edward's family and I were in. I squeezed Edward's hands tightly, showing him that I had no intention of letting him leave me anytime soon.

"You did it, Bella."

"Twice in one day, that's a record."

My voice shook from frustration and my hold on his hands became even tighter. He stiffened a little and I realized that I was holding onto his hands too hard. I loosened my hold on him and moved my face to his shoulder as Carlisle walked into the room.

"Is Bella okay?"

Esme's voice sounded very concerned and I felt Edwards head nod. I started to feel wave of calm again and I realized then that Jasper and Alice had not moved from my side.

"Carlisle, come with me."

I heard Esme usher Carlisle into another part of the house and I tried to refrain myself from listening to their conversation.

"I think we need to let Bella get some air."

Emmett's voice sounded guarded and I felt him kneel beside Edward. His hand rested on my knee and squeezed it gently.

"Bella, what do you want to do right now?"

Edwards voice whispered gently in my hair and caused my body to tingle. I pulled away from his shoulder and looked at him. My eyes were glazed over. I had no idea on what I wanted to do. I just wanted life to go back to normal. I didn't answer him. I just stared into his eyes sadly, completely forgetting the other people in the room.

"I can go take her shopping!"

Alice was smiling brightly and Edward broke our gaze and glared at her. She scowled back at him.

"Take her to your room, Edward, and let her relax a little."

My eyes turned to Jasper and he smiled at me. When he smiled I couldn't do anything but smile back at him. He had a way of making me feel comfortable no matter how stressed out I seemed to be. I looked back toward Edward when I felt him rise to his feet and his hands pulling me up with him.

Edward pulled me roughly and hurriedly up the stairs and through the long hallway that led to all the bedrooms. At the very end of the hall Edward finally pulled me through a door and brought me into his room.

He let go of my hand once he closed the door and went over to the side of his wall that was completely covered with millions of CD's. I rolled my eyes and went over to the black leather couch and laid down on it. As soon as I heard soft music playing I felt to strong hands lift my head up and lay it gently down.

I opened my eyes and saw his staring at me intently. I laughed softy and his fingers started to trace my face. I flicked his nose playfully and he laughed pulling my hand towards his lips.

"I'm sorry."

"About what?"

"About what happened just a few minutes ago. I knew that was going to happen and I know it will happen again. "

My face was contorted with anger and my voice was drenched with frustration. Was I going to have to live forever this way not being able to control myself? Would others always have to be in control of me because I didn't have the strength to control myself? I am the strongest vampire ever created; no one should ever be able to take advantage of me.

"That's why we are all going to help you, Bella."

"I should be able to do this on my own. I should have the strength to do whatever I want."

"Even the greatest need help."

"I shouldn't need it."

A look of hurt flashed through his eyes for a brief second, puzzling me. I looked at him questioningly and he just looked up at the ceiling, drifting off with his thoughts. I yanked gently on his shirt. He smiled at me but it didn't reach his eyes.

"Why is it so wrong for me to help you, especially if that's the only thing in the world I want to do right now?"

I smiled sadly, my eyes faltering.

"Why would you want to help me? After everything I have put you and your family through, you still want to help me. I don't understand you."

He ran his fingers over my face gently trailing my lips down my chin, and down my jaw. He watched his fingers with gentle eyes and then smiled weakly.

"You'll understand soon enough."

I glared at him and he just smiled down at me. He leaned down and kissed my neck gently and then started to make his way up my jaw. I closed my eyes. I felt so confused. He intertwined our fingers together as he continued to kiss me everywhere but my lips. We stayed like that for an immeasurable amount of time.

**Yay! Another chapter done! Okay…How about a little more reviews than last time. ****20 reviews**** is a good goal. This chapter was kind of a filler, there will be a lot of action, mystery, and hopefully romance coming soon.**

**--Ditz4lyf**


	9. Chapter 9

I knew what I was capable of. I knew what I could do if I was pushed to my full potential. My powers were unflawed and made into complete perfection. I came across so docile and innocent but inside I was unruly and ferocious. When Aro had brought me back to the Volturi, they decided to "run tests" on me. They wanted to see what my powers were fully capable of and they, therefore, pushed me to my limits. They saw how strong I was, how quick I was, and how powerful my senses could become. I could hear things from miles away and smell things that were presumably impossibly. I was truly amazing. Since I was so lethal, they wanted to see how I would react with pain and how fast I could recover from injuries; in other words, how I would handle a battle if it was just me against thirty or more of the best vampires ever, would I win? Vampires healing abilities were relatively fast. Just imagine the possibilities of how my body could handle them. I went through a very long six months with nothing but different objects slicing through my skin and I learned many different tricks to adjust to certain situations so I always had the upper hand when I started to hunt or was in a fight. It was through my very first year with the Volturi that I learned how to kill at any moment, how to follow their exact orders. If I had to kill a whole entire clan of vampires, I would do it for nothing more than just pure game.

Under their influence I had become impenetrable. Nothing could hurt me or bother me. They had told me that the tests were for my own good. They were learning how to teach me how to control my senses. When I became angry or nervous, my senses instinctively rose and started to take over my body acting as a form of protection. They told me that I was fine now, that I was now in control of my own body.

When I was out on my own, away form the Volturi finding out information about other vampires, I never looked back at my first couple of years with the Volturi. It always made me angry and uncomfortable but I never understood why. Being with Edward made everything clearer. It was as Edward had put it, their way of "controlling" me. I guess that somehow, in the back of my mind, before I had met Edward, I knew that that's what the Volturi had been doing. I just didn't have the strength to admit it aloud. I didn't want to admit it or acknowledge it because that was a sign of weakness and it wasn't accepted in the Volturi.

I knew that no matter how right it felt to be with this family, I was going to cause them more and more pain. I knew that I may be able to control my senses right now, but when the Volturi would send someone to check up on me, then everything would fall apart. I had allowed them to get too far underneath my skin and now they were permanently there. No matter how long the Cullen's worked with me to try and keep things under control, it would never work. I had lived under the Volturi's way of life for far too long.

Now I realize that no matter how strong I am physically, I have become a complete disaster mentally. I know why it is so easy living under the Volturi's orders. It's because it allows you to mostly rely on your senses, something that comes so naturally and you don't have to work hard at. It's at a point where you physically, mentally, or emotionally feel anything neither good nor bad. The Cullen's chose to rarely ever use their senses, allowing them to be more human, feel more human and behave more human. I might look more human than any of them but inside, I was more the monster that we were created to be. I couldn't handle human emotions as well as they could. I had learned not to trust while living with the Volturi but they had learned how to never keep secretes. They shared things openly. They all trusted each other equally.

I wished so deeply that I could one day be like that. That one day I could openly show someone the trust that the Cullen's showed one another. I was dreaming though, because I knew I could never be that way. I wasn't taught to be that way and I was afraid that I would never be able to learn nor understand it.

"Bella?"

Edwards whisper brought my thoughts back into reality. I smiled sadly, my past thoughts still fresh in my mind. I knew that if anyone was going to get hurt when my senses took complete control over me, it would be Edward. He would be trying to help me gain control over myself, and I would hurt him both physically and emotionally. When I had a goal set in front of me, I always got what I came for, something that had been embedded so deep into my head from the many years of training with the Volturi. That only happened, of course, when I would rely on my senses; when I had control over my body, I was never able to get what I wanted. I would never be able to have him.

My eyes quickly avoided his before he could see the pain that flashed through them. My eyes glazed over with water. Making my eyes look as if they were made of pure glass.

"Bella are you okay?"

Edward's face looked panicked. If I could ever love, I would want to love him, but I was incapable of love. The only thing I could ever do was destroy. I truly hated what I had allowed myself to become. My eyes still didn't meet his.

"Yes."

My voice was barely audible and I was unsure of whether or not he had actually heard what I had said. I rose off of the couch and walked away from him to where he had all of his CD's neatly organized on the wall.

His arms wrapped around my waist and at that moment I hated myself more than ever. It was not only going to kill him when everything went wrong, it was going to kill me as well. The worst thing about it was, he would most likely be dead and I would have to live for an eternity hating myself and trying to kill myself for losing him.

I turned quickly around and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling me into him as far as I could. His arms around my waist tightened and I buried my head deep into his neck. I twined my fingers into his hair. He loosened one of his arms from around my waist and cupped the back of my neck gently pulling my face further into his. His nose trailed up and down my neck and every once in a while, he would lay a random kiss which made my head spin. I slid my hands out of his hair and held his neck allowing my fingers to gently run up and down his neck. He pushed his head further into my direction until our foreheads where touching. We stayed like that for a few moments, but it didn't feel long enough.

He began rocking us both backwards and forwards. His hand started to rub circles on my back and he pushed his lips to my ears.

"I am going to help you no matter what. I'm not going to leave you."

My body started to tremble slightly. When his lips brushed against my ear I felt pain run through my whole entire body, including my dead heart.

"Please, Edward, don't make me any promises."

Our rocking stopped and he pulled away immediately, forcing me to stare into his eyes. Pain, confusion, and hurt flashed through his eyes simultaneously.

"Do you think I will not fulfill my promises?"

His voice was sad and somewhat distant. My hand rose to brush the side of his cheek and I smiled sadly at him.

"It's not that I don't trust you. I just don't trust myself."

His hand rose and swiftly caught my hand that was trailing aimlessly along his cheek. He brought my fingertips to his lips and he kissed each one gently while staring me in eyes.

"Maybe if you give yourself a little more credit and trust yourself a little bit more, maybe then it would be easier for you to control your senses."

I thought for a moment taking his words in carefully. Maybe if I did make a choice in my mind that I was strong enough to defeat the true monster I was, maybe then I could control my senses. I smiled at him.

"Perhaps."

He smiled back at me, cupping my chin while he gaze into my eyes. He brought his face level to mine.

"Also, maybe if you had someone you wanted, helping you. Perhaps then it would be easier to control your senses?"

I knew what he meant. My eyes closed tightly as I tried to comprehend everything he had said completely. I tried to find hidden meanings between his words but there were none. He wanted to be the person worth fighting for. He wanted to help me as much as he could but he also knew that if I wanted him, I would fight much harder to keep control over myself than I had ever done before.

His eyes started to dim as I took my time to answer. When he was about to pull away with the thought that he was not going to get an answer, I stopped him with a finger to his lips.

"That would help greatly."

He smiled weakly, the sadness still showing in his eyes.

"Do you have someone in mind?"

He smiled like a little boy with a sheepish grin waiting in line for candy at the candy store.

"Yes…"

He brought one of his eyebrows up in questioning and I shook my head no.

"Why can't I know?"

"Because it's a secret."

I bit my bottom lip innocently and his smiled brightened.

"But I'm your best friend. Don't best friends tell each other secretes?"

I pretended to take offense to what he had just said. I playfully pushed away from him crossing my arms over my chest and glaring at him. He just smiled back at me with amusement.

"First of all, Edward Cullen, when did you decide that you were my best friend? Secondly, if you were my best friend, I would never tell you any of my secrets. You're horrible at keeping them."

He yanked me back closer to him and he smiled.

"Then stop hanging out with me. I must be an awful influence on you."

I punched him playfully and he just started to laugh. He ran his fingers through my hair and then pulled my face to his chest. He kissed my forehead playfully.

"Really though, who would you have in mind?"

His chin was resting on my head. I was able to think clearly because I didn't have to stare into his eyes.

"You already know."

I could feel him smiling and he laughed quietly.

"I just want to make sure I know that what I am thinking is the right answer. That way I'm not assuming things and then receive weird looks by making a wrong move."

"You are so conceited! You're assuming that person is you!"

"I'm hoping."

I smiled and laughed quietly.

"Are you laughing at me now?"

"I think that you are completely absurd."

"It most certainly does not give you the right to laugh in my face."

"Yes it does."

"How so?"

"It just does."

"Why?"

"Because I am amazing and because what ever I say goes. That's why. Have a problem with it? Deal with it."

"Well aren't you just the bossy one"

He laughed and I couldn't help but laugh with him. Finally when I settled down, I pulled away to look at him in the eyes. We didn't smile at each other. We just stared at one another knowing, somehow, that both of us wanted something more.

"What are we now? I mean, after all, we aren't hiding any more big secrets from each other."

His eyes were curious, waiting to hear my response. I could tell he was nervous to hear what I was going to say but I also knew that he knew that he was more than just a friend to me now.

"I don't know. What do you want to be?"

I knew he wasn't going to push me right into a very serious relationship like a 'mate' or something of that nature.

"Anything that's more than just friends."

"How about… friends with benefits? That's more than just friends."

I smiled at him playfully and he grinned mischievously.

"That would work but if we were friends with benefits, we would kiss each other. We haven't even done that. Also, that means I would have to share you with someone else if you chose to be with someone else, but I am too selfish for that. What about boyfriend and girlfriend?"

"Don't you think that we're moving to fast?"

"Bella, after everything that has happened today; I don't think that we could move any faster. You went from being human to a vampire in less than a minute. That was a pretty large thing to digest completely."

"Yah, but you don't eat."

"I guess that just made it easier."

"No. I'm pretty sure it's because I'm so cute, adorable, brilliant, perfect, amazing…"

"Oh, man. You forgot the main ingredients, Bella! Sour, mischievous, troublemaker, evil, flawed…. I could go on and on."

"Please do. We have an eternity."

"You would spend and eternity with me?"

"If I wanted to I would."

"Do you want to?"

"That's another secrete I am unable to share with you at this time."

He glared at me and I started to laugh. I pushed him playfully walking away from him and back to the couch. I sat on it and laid my head down on the headrest. He came over to sit next to me but I pushed him off.

"Go away, you're making me exhausted."

"No!"

With that, he laid across the couch with his head in my lap.

"What gave you the brilliant idea that you were wanted here on my lap?"

He just smiled at me and closed his eyes, leaving no signs that he was getting up any time soon.

"You are such a child!"

"You love me though."

"Now what gave you the idea that I loved you?"

He didn't answer me. He turned his face into my stomach a kept it there. I rolled my eyes. He acted like such a four year old sometimes, it was ridiculous. I took in his form and smiled. Eternity wouldn't seem so bad if it could be spent with someone that you cared for with all your heart. I knew, somehow, that if I spent an eternity with Edward and his family, I wouldn't regret any of it.

My fingers traced his face unconsciously. I moved across his eyelids, over his lips, around his nose and through his hair. He was the definition of perfection. I twisted my body to its side and laid my head on his stomach with my arms acting as a pillow. His head still rested on my legs and he opened his eyes slightly to look at me. I looked back at him and smiled slightly.

"Eternity doesn't seem like such a bad idea if you spend it with the right person."

"It doesn't?"

He shook his head from side to side, our eyes never breaking contact.

"You know, I've lived for about one hundred years and never in my life did I think that I was going to find someone I wanted to be with. I thought I was complete in myself. I could have never been more wrong about something than that."

His words caused my heart to ache. I knew that I could not say the same thing to him, at least not yet. I still wasn't sure what path I was going to follow; although I knew which path I so desperately wanted to choose. I didn't open my mouth to respond. Honestly, I didn't know what I could say to that.

He closed his eyes once again and started to hum a tune I had never heard before. It was beautiful and I couldn't help but find myself smile as I listened to him.

"Have you ever found the person that you want to live an eternity with?"

Although I thought I knew the answer, I wanted to be sure. If he said yes, I wouldn't ever live with the Volturi again. I would live, forever, with the Cullen's. His eyes met mine again and he smiled his crocked smile.

"Yes, I have found the one I want."

I thought he was going to tell me the name of the person who he thought he wanted to spend the rest of eternity with, but he didn't say another word. He just stared back into my eyes and I turned my head sadly to the side. I memorized his wall as my fingers traced circles on his shirt.

"Do you want to know who she is?"

My eyes snapped back to his. He knew I wanted to know. This was a statement and not a question. I nodded my head in agreement and my eyes wavered from his. His hand reached over toward my face and touched it tenderly. My eyes were sad and I felt more vulnerable than I had ever felt before. I wasn't used to feeling this way. If he said one wrong thing I felt like I could shatter into pieces.

"Bella, it's you."

I was excited and scared all at the same time. Before I came to Forks, I had no weakness. Now that I was here, I had everything to lose. I couldn't lose him. He told me he wanted me for eternity and now I would never be the same girl that the Volturi created me to be. I would be just as lethal as they had seen me before, but I would no longer defend them. I couldn't leave him.

I wanted to smile and throw my arms around him and tell him how much I wanted to be with him and how happy I was that he felt the same way as I did, but my years with the Volturi had trained me otherwise. They had always trained to me to never 'fall in love'.

"No one is good enough for you, Bella." Aro had told me that over and over again. Drilling into my head that no one could ever be my partner for life. I was far to perfect for anyone. I was perfectly dangerous. I was everyone's weakness and I just found mine, the Cullen's and Edward. If anything was going to happen to me, it would be because I was defending them. Somehow, in the back of my mind, I knew that it was true. My heart, my body, my everything was here for them now. They have chosen to bring me into the family and make me feel as if I were already apart of it and I would do anything I could to show them the same courtesy.

My eyes focused on a button on his shirt. I refused to stare directly into his eyes at this moment. He shifted from underneath me and a hand cupped my chin timidly. I turned my head to the side, refusing to be forced to look him straight in the eye. Even though that is what I wanted to hear to have the only excuse I needed to let myself stay here with him, I was frightened knowing the consequences that were soon to follow.

"Bella, were you not ready for me to tell you that?"

I could hear the sadness in his voice and it pained me to know that I was making him feel that way. My eyes quickly searched for his. When our eyes found each other, I smiled at him confidently.

"No. That's exactly what I needed to hear."

"Are you sure I didn't frighten you."

I took his hand in mine and squeezed it while I winked at him.

"Honestly. I really did need to hear that. It's going to make my decisions about the future a lot easier."

He smiled, beaming at me, and he readjusted us so that I was lying with him, my head resting on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around me in a protective matter, as if he was trying to keep anyone from taking me away from him. He was silent, in deep thought and I decided to let him think with out any interruptions.

**Another chapter done! Tell me what you liked, didn't like, and what you want more of. DO YOU WANT MORE ROMANCE, MYSTERY….? ****REVIEW ****and tell me what you would like more of. **

**---Ditz4lyf**


	10. Chapter 10

Edward had left with most of his family to go hunting. Even though I had been nervous at first about him leaving, I felt that it was much easier to think once he was gone. Carlisle, Alice, and Emmett had all stayed behind. Apparently, they had went hunting recently and decided to stay with me instead of leaving me alone. Even under the circumstances of why I had come here, Carlisle seemed fairly relaxed at being around me and I could hardly say the same for myself. When Edward had been here with me, it had allowed me to think of something promising, hopeful, and exciting instead of continuously dwelling on something I did not want to, which was mainly Carlisle.

I fidgeted under the constant stares coming from Emmett, Alice and Carlisle. Alice had a smile on her face like she knew something I didn't and was using all the control she had to refrain herself from pulling me off the couch, into her room, and do nothing but talk excitedly to me for the next millennium. Emmett sat next to Alice, his face clearly showing every emotion he was feeling. He wanted to be nice to me but felt the need to stay guard so I didn't try anything. He was trying to decide to talk to me or leave me alone, it sounds as if I didn't look to happy to be sitting in a room with them. I tried to smile but failed miserably. I felt terribly uncomfortable both with everyone staring at me and because Carlisle was sitting in the same exact room as me. My hands tightened across my chest tightly and my hands balled into tight fist causing my knuckles to turn white.

Carlisle was hard to read. His face was almost as expressionless as a brick wall and it made me all the more curious to find out what he was truly thinking. His posture was perfect, his look almost coming across as snobbish but for some reason he came across gentler.

I had made up my mind before Edward had left; I wanted to talk to Carlisle. I knew it wasn't exactly safe for me to be as near as I was to him, or any of the Cullen's for that matter, but Edward was ignoring my warnings about the Volturi. If I truly wanted to stay with the Cullen's, I was going to have to help them any way I could, even if that meant defending them against the Volturi. I could do that, right?

I cleared my throat hesitantly and opened my mouth but as soon as I did, my mind drew a blank and so I clamped my mouth shut. Carlisle raised one eyebrow in genuine curiosity and Alice's smile just grew wider, encouraging me to continue.

How was I going to tell them something about the Volturi? Even though I had chosen to stay with the Cullen's, it didn't mean I should tell them everything about the Volturi. I couldn't share their greatest weaknesses or anything that could possibly hurt them. The Volturi had raised me for a long time; the least I could do was respect them.

The discussion Edward and I had about the Volturi replayed over and over in my head. "_They're using you._" I shuddered at the thought. How many people had I willingly allowed to use me without my own knowledge? How many more people would try and take advantage of me?

"Bella, it's alright if you want to say something. Don't be nervous. You're already part of our family so there is nothing you can say that will bother us. We're here for you now."

Emmett was smiling politely at me. His eyes were bright and excited, like he had wanted to say something to me ever since I got here and was now overjoyed that he finally was able to say something that had vaguely comforted me.

I smiled sweetly back at him but I still wasn't sure if I should tell them or not. My mind started to spin with the positives and negatives about the situation at hand, part of the training I had to endure while living with the Volturi.

"It's nothing important. I don't want to bother you with inconsequential matters."

"Anything you have to say is at the utmost of importance." Alice said nonchalantly.

Alice couldn't contain herself any longer and bounced out of her seat and toward me. She sat on the arm rest of the chair, and I instantly drew back in alarm. My eyes narrowed at hers but she just beamed back at me, either completely unaware or indifferent to what she could trigger in me if she made a wrong move. Edward had said that the reason the Volturi could control me was when they sent a trigger off in me. I hoped Alice wouldn't do that accidentally but she was doing a pretty good job at it.

"Did it have anything to do about the Volturi?"

It didn't surprise me that Carlisle had come to the correct conclusion first. My whole body froze for the exception of my head which nodded numbly in agreement.

"Usually, we do not keep any secrets in the family but if you need to, we can make an exception for you if it would make you feel more comfortable."

I didn't need any exceptions as a sign of pity. What I needed was the knowledge to be able to differentiate the black from the white. For the past couple of days now I had been consumed in a grey fog and I could barely make up my own mind about things.

"I don't believe that Edward is taking into full consideration the fact that I am part of the Volturi and what it may cost you if I stay much longer. I know they're coming soon, very soon. I'm not sure he understands completely what they will do in order to get me back. When they come, I can not be definite about which side I will choose."

Emmett's face turned perturbed and livid all at once, his face scrutinizing mine with great detail.

"Bella, look at what they have done to you! They have you acting like some pet!"

He jumped up from his chair and Alice leaned back looking for any signs of rage in my face. Emmett started to walk around the room while fuming. Carlisle; however, still hadn't moved an inch from his chair.

"Look what they did to her, Carlisle. They've trained her like humans train little puppies to go to the restroom outside. They know how to control her. Look! Even now they still have control over her even though she knows that her heart wants her to stay here. It's disgusting!"

I stiffened at his comments. My eyes glowered at him my posture becoming a rigged statue and my lips started to curl upwards, showing my perfect teeth. Carlisle immediately came alert and clamped a hand over Emmett's mouth, his eyes never leaving my form. Emmett finally followed Carlisle's gaze toward me and met my piercing eyes. His eyes widened slightly. The whole room had frozen, the people, the time, the whole entire moment. A snarl started to lightly build its way out of my chest causing both Emmett to flinch behind Carlisle and Alice to leave her sitting spot next to me.

Emmett shot Carlisle an apologetic look and then his eyes softened again when meeting mine. His footsteps were slow and cautious as he made his way to me. He stopped just two feet away and lowered his head to meet my gaze.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I really didn't mean anything I said."

His voice shook and I knew he was lying. I knew not only because his eyes kept darting to the left as he tried to look at any place but my form even though it was right in front of him and because I knew myself, that what he had said was true.

After a few moments I settled down. Emmett had begun to relax and sat on the floor where he had been crouching. He smiled up at me like a dumb fool and I rolled my eyes irately.

"See, I can help you control yourself! I am good at something no matter what anyone says to me."

I heard Alice grunt and I glared at him swiftly and angrily.

"The only reason what you said helped was because I already knew that. I had already spoken to Edward about the 'controlling thing' and agreed so don't think that you did anyone favors."

"Actually, Bella, I think he just figured out one way to calm you down once you start getting into vampire mode."

My eyes switched from Emmett's form to Carlisle's. I raised my eyebrows in sincere curiosity, begging him to prove me wrong. Carlisle smiled at my nonverbal accusation and began speaking.

"You said he reminded you of something you believed in, thus, allowing you to make a conscious choice to calm yourself."

What he said made sense but I didn't rest my case. I knew my eyes hadn't even lightened. If Alice and Emmett had been afraid of me when I wasn't even truly becoming the monster I was then they would be mortified if my senses took control of me.

"I wasn't even allowing my senses to take control over me at that moment though. I was just angry; it's just sort of like my way to defend myself sometimes. When my senses do take control though, it happens so quickly. It's almost like they're able to just flick the switch on and off when ever they please. You won't have time to try and help me when my senses begin to control me once one of the members of the Volturi arrives. Like Emmett said, they'll control me like their royal puppy."

Emmett winced slightly, obviously thinking I was offended at what he had said a few moments ago. When I had first heard it, I was, but knew it was true. It's hard to get mad at someone when all they're doing is speaking the truth.

"You keep insisting on telling us about the Volturi. Why is that?"

My head snapped toward Alice's curios gaze. I answered her through gritted teeth.

"Because no one is paying attention to what I am saying. If you thought I was scary moment before, you would die if you saw me for what I truly am."

Her eyes softened tremendously and she took her seat back on the armrest and looked at me through extremely sad and terrified eyes.

"Edward has lived for over one hundred years and never found someone he ever wanted to be with. Now that he has, we are willing to take any possible risk to keep you and him together. You can't be at bad as you think you are if Edward wants to be with you. He's already given you his whole heart; you and I both know that."

My eyes pierced hers with pain and she recognized it immediately.

"It's pointless, Alice. All of you are signing a death wish, you are aware of this right?"

She shook her head from side to side just like a mother would if she were chastising her son for simply not understanding anything at all. Her eyes filled with grief and she put her hand on my shoulders slowly, being careful to not put me on alert again.

"Do you think any of us could look into his eyes for the next hundred years if he lost you? He's never been happier, Bella. You may not realize it because you didn't see him before he met you but we can see the difference in him, the excitement, the happiness, the joy. It all becomes so intoxicating but in a fairly good way."

My eyes tore away from hers. Her talking about Edward that way was making me miss him and wishing he would come to the house soon. My eyes reluctantly moved back onto Carlisle who had surprisingly moved up and stood about five and a half feet away.

He smiled at me but shook his head at me as if I was some crazy bum on the street and he laughed when I sent him a hard glare. His laugh sent waves a kindness in my direction. It's almost as if he made me feel like a normal, human, sixteen year old again and I was comforted about the idea.

"Bella, I know you're worried but we also have to worry about Edward now. Believe it or not, for the first time you're not going to face something alone. This whole family is going to be here with you when the Volturi comes. We need, want, and would love to have you stay with us."

His eyes had started to twinkle, reminding me slightly of Charlie in the sense that he looked more fatherly.

"Plus, Bella, we'll know when they get here."

My eyebrow raised in an almost challenging way but I made it a little bit kinder seeing how I lost the last time I had done that.

"Alice can predict the future."

Emmett smiled sheepishly at me and then smiled wickedly.

"I'm the strongest."

I let out an exaggerated sigh and gave him an exasperated look.

"Well too bad, buddy; because from now on you're only going to be second strongest so I hope you enjoyed yourself while I was not here."

He smirked a little and then put out his hand as to make a deal.

"You're on. We can hold a wrestling match when ever you think you can handle it."

As I was about to take his hand in mine Carlisle's voice cut in hurriedly

"You two might want to wait on that wrestling match for a little while though. We don't want to cause something to go off in Bella, remember? I think even a friendly fight might cause things to happen that we don't necessarily want."

Emmett and I both shook our heads in agreement to what Carlisle had said but still shook each others hands anyway.

"Fine, we'll have our wrestling match after everything settles down."

I smiled a true smile. Something that had only happened when I was with Edward, but it felt nice to also have other people make me smile that way. Carlisle took another step forward causing my whole body to be put on edge but my mind still continued to stay clear.

"Bella, you're getting better with your senses already!"

Alice's excitement could have been seen even by a blind person. I rolled my eyes at her sudden outburst of enthusiasm at something as simple as being able to control my senses, although, it truly was something that required a lot of concentration and determination.

My smile didn't fade, in fact, it grew even larger. I was proud of myself to an extent, I was starting to put my heart before my senses, but I didn't know how long it would stay that way. Everyone seemed to feel that the outcome of this mess was going to be a good one, well everyone but me. In my eyes there was only one possible outcome: death, destruction and madness. With these thoughts my smile disappeared as quickly as it had come. I averted my eyes, trying to prevent Emmett or Alice from reading the pain that was painted vividly on them but, somehow, Carlisle met my gaze. Our eyes were locked for a few moments and then he asked Alice and Emmett to leave.

They left fuming telling Carlisle that they could keep any secretes if I asked them too but Carlisle ushered them out of hearing range. We sat in the same room, but on completely opposite sides.

"You see a completely different future than the rest of us do."

I nodded in agreement to Carlisle's statement knowing that I was going to have to give him an explanation but I had great doubt in the fact that he would understand any of it.

"I believe the reason why we see a good outcome from this because we believe in you. You're frightened because you don't believe in yourself. You're afraid that when they come, they will control you just like they do every other time."

"Edward had told me that maybe if I had something worth fighting for, though, then maybe I could fight them off by myself. Maybe if I knew that I had something here for me, I could protect it instead of destroy it."

"That could work but it depends on how much you want it. Bella, do you truly want to be here? Is this life what you want, to be with us, to be with Edward?"

Visions from when I had once lived with the Volturi flashed through my head. There had been a time where I had thought I wanted to be with someone there too, but I had chosen not to. I felt like I was being persuaded more by Aro that I loved him instead of my heart. I had told Aro that I might love him, but now was not the time to begin a relationship, especially if I was not going to be living in Italy for a while.

He was still waiting for me to return to Italy, to live for an eternity with him.

I was also going to have to take into consideration the Cullen's way of life if I chose to live with them. I wouldn't be able to drink human's blood, just disgusting animals blood and the thought did not appeal to me. The thought sent chills up my arms.

Carlisle caught the distant look in my eyes and the long pause it was taking me to answer his question. When my mind finally cleared and I was able to meet his gaze, he looked sad. His eyebrow raised in curiosity.

"What were you thinking about?"

When my mouth refused to open to answer his question his eyes glazed over. His perfect posture became slightly rigid and his face became regretful.

"You're not just scared about the Volturi coming because they are strong and powerful. There are other reasons you don't want them to come."

I looked away sadly, a thin layer of water covering my eyes creating an almost glassy look. I stared at the wall, unable to look at Carlisle's face any longer.

"Someone is waiting for me. I told you they would do anything it would take to bring me back to them, especially him. I wasn't in love with him but he was with me. He won't allow Edward to take me away from him. I have already prolonged my living with the Volturi in order to have an excuse to not be with him. Once he finds out I am here because of someone else, he will destroy anything in his path to get me and the Volturi will give him their full support."

My eyes flickered to Carlisle's so I could try and read what he was thinking through his body language. He seemed to be taking in everything I said with much detail, no longer taking this as a light matter. He was now seeing the outcome I was and shook his head sadly.

"Also, your way of life will be difficult for me. I have never tried animals blood and I have never abstained myself from the luxury of human blood unlike you and your family. All I am doing is causing chaos for you."

His eyes met mine with worry embedded into them. His usual calm and collective look that he usually carried with him, completely disappeared, masked by an ominous future. He looked as if he were about to be sick and quickly left the room leaving me to sit there alone. My head spun, the water in my eyes grew and my heart hurt. The only way for them to live was for me to leave.

Before anyone could come back into the room Carlisle had left me in, I was gone. I had disappeared into thin air and I promised myself to never go back. I would never cause them pain ever again. I was not going to be a danger to them.

I left many false leads just incase any of them tried to find me; they would never be able to. This is what I had been raised to do, constantly mislead. I had to stay close though, the Volturi would come here first to try and find me. I had no idea what I was going to say to them when I appeared before them empty handed.

They would want Carlisle and I wouldn't have him. I couldn't let them take him but I could not go back now to the Cullen's and tell them to leave. If they were smart enough, they would do so the minute that Edward and the rest of his family came back from hunting.

Carlisle was a smart man; he would know what I wanted him to do when he appeared back into the room where he had left me, only to discover that I was not there. It had to happen, both of us knew it. I could read his eyes and he could read mine. The only way for no harm to come of this was for him and his family to leave, and for me to disappear forever and to return to the Volturi.

My future with Edward was no longer an option. The only future I had was with the Volturi and the one who desperately wanted me to be their partner.

A few hours passed, and I knew the Volturi was here now. There was no doubt about it. I could sense them here. They carried some sort of snobbish aroma that was distinct even in a forest full of animals and a forest where the scent of vampires that where on a hunting trip hours before still lingered. I was deep in the woods, not hiding, but thinking of how life could have been if I were in a fairy tell, but sadly I was not. I was the devils creature and therefore life never happened the way you wanted it too.

My senses started to heighten slightly, but I still remained in control. The footsteps I heard where light and clearly distinct. The conversation I had with Carlisle ran through my head. I should have known that the first person the Volturi would send after me would be him. He had wanted to see me ever since I left.

Even when I went to the Volturi for a few days because I needed to speak to Aro about something, I had managed to use my senses to my advantage and avoid him. The footsteps had come to a silent walk that only I could hear. It would have been impossible to hear if I were any other vampire.

I couldn't run now, it would be ridiculous to even try and hide from him. It would cause some suspicion and that was something I didn't need at this very moment. I stayed where I was sitting, at the base of a tree in the meadow that Edward had brought me. The sunlight brushed against my skin as the sun set, casting beautiful colors into the sky.

I heard a silent intake of breath and closed my eyes smiling sadly. The footsteps remained quite but careless as they made their way to my still form.

"Bella?"

I hadn't heard his voice in forever and I had almost forgotten how it had sounded. I opened my eyes and turned my head into the direction that my name was called. I met his red eyes as his form remained in the shadow. His body no longer as beautiful to my eyes as it had once been before, he couldn't match to Edward. I winced inwardly and could barely keep a look of pain from appearing onto my face. My voice sounded sad even to my own ears and I wondered if he would catch it.

"Hey, Felix."

"You have no idea how much I have missed you."

**Okay chapter done. I had tons of problems writing this. I didn't have many reviews so I wasn't sure really how to write this chapter. Honestly, reviews help me. More reviews means the quicker the chapter comes out and it usually means you'll like it better because it won't sound so forced. HOW DO YOU LIKE THIS CHAPTER? I'm not sure how it went. Please review**

**Thanks!**

**---Ditz4lyf**


	11. Chapter 11

**I wanted to thank my reviewers for the motivation which allowed me to get through this chapter. I was going through a very nasty writers block but with some kind words, I was motivated to not give up, and instead, keep writing.**

**Special Thanks To:**

_**SkyCullen**_**- You help me constantly with your honest opinions and your kind words help me continue to write all the time!**

_**Blackirises**_**- Your reviews truly did help me with my writing. Thank you so much for your reviews. I must admit, without them, I probably wouldn't have written this chapter. :(**

_**Transfiguration**_**- I'm not sure if this was the complete "other side" of Bella, but it was very close. I hope you enjoy this. Your review is one reason I decided to make this chapter this way. Hope you enjoy.**

_**SmilinSmiles**_**- Although your review was short and simple, it was motivating. It let me know how you like my chapter and it let me know you at least despise Felix (just like me) :)**

_**excitingem555**_**- Hahaha! I loved your review. The swooshing was interesting to read. It's always awesome to receive a couple of interesting reviews. :)**

_**smileon**_**- You always review and it always makes me excited to hear what you have to say!**

_**lost in romance**_**- Your review was honest when you told me that last chapter was not really your favorite. Thank you! I just hope that this chapter is more to your liking :)**

_**ouiplanete**_**- It was really interesting to hear that you actually liked my little twist with Felix being Bella's promised one. I was really excited to hear that.**

_**FangedMoonEyes**_**- Your review was exceptionally long and very interesting to read. You sounded interested and curious and that's always good for an author to hear. Thanks!**

**MANY OTHERS REVIEWED AND HELPED ME THROUGH THE WRITING OF THIS CHAPTER. THE ONES LISTED ABOVE WERE THE PEOPLE WHOMS REVIEWS STOOD OUT TO ME FOR SOME ODD REASON. I WOULD LIKE TO THANK **_**EVERYONE **_**WHO HAS **_**REVIEWED**_

* * *

On with the story..

_Chapter 11_

I couldn't help but close my eyes as he walked into the sunlight, glistening, to take a seat by me. As soon as he sat, the tension in the air became intense and I had to put a great deal of effort to prevent my lips from curling up, showing my deadly teeth and showing him how I truly felt at that moment. I was furious. I was sad. I was heart broken. I was in absolutely no mood to be anywhere near him at this moment. He was the last person in the world that I wanted to see. My hands started to shake at my side with fury and so I clenched them into fists as I crossed my arms over my chest. I felt his gaze running all over my body; from my hair, down my neck, over my shoulders, my stomach, down my legs and ended at my feet. I had never felt so completely violated in my life.

My eyes snapped open and my face turned only a few inches away from his. He moved back slightly in shock, not having seen me perform any of these motions but leaned back in once he composed himself. My eyes where cold and distant, my face was firm. Every muscle in my body had become on edge. His red eyes looked deep into mine, trying to figure out whether I was in control of my senses or not.

"Bella, are you okay?"

All I could do was let out a snort. He disgusted me. I was in control of my self. I was in control of my own senses, something both the Volturi and him were trying to prevent me from being able to do. I pulled back away, into the same sitting position he had found me when he first arrived. When I spoke, my voice had become as dangerous as an avalanche and cold as a snow storm. I was in no mood to have him be misled in what I was thinking.

"It's funny how wrong you can be of some people. You think they're one thing but they turn out to be something completely different. "

My eyes flickered to his form so quick that he wasn't able to catch it.

"You out of all people should have prevented them from controlling me. Instead, you helped them. When you professed your undying love to me, was that one of your tactics to control me too?"

As I spoke my lips began to curl and my teeth glistened beautifully into the sunlight. A growl started erupting deep from my chest.

"Bella, you know that I do love you. I didn't tell you that I loved you because it would help them. I told you that because I truly did feel that way about you and still do."

His voice had become instantly serious, his whole body tensing at my side. My temper was rising unintentionally and it was becoming harder and harder to control myself.

"Right. You care so much about me that you were willing to let the Volturi control me in any way that they saw fit. You lied to me, Felix. Never again will I trust you."

"Bella, don't be this way. They were only doing it for your own good."

Instantly I sprang to my feet, my will to control myself slowly beginning to give in. My glistening teeth opened dangerously near his face. The venom started to pour and the ache in the back of my throat had never been worse.

"You do_ not _honestly believe that them controlling me was for my own good!"

"Bella, what has happened to you?"

His voice was sad and distant. Instantly I settled down, allowing my eyes to focus on his red ones. His eyes were gentle and worried. It was wrong of me to blame everything on him. In the Volturi, he was my only true friend other than Aro.

"You need to leave, Felix. You need to get as far away as possible from me. You're not safe as long as you stay near me."

His face became concerned and hard. His eyes stared at me with some foreign longing, something I had never seen in his eyes before. He slowly started to move closer and closer to me. His hand reached out to touch my face but I pulled away.

"I'm not the one you love, Felix."

His form transformed into a statue that stared at me carefully. His voice didn't quiver with uncertainty when he replied.

"Of course you're the one I love, Bella. I knew it the first time I saw you."

"There's no such thing at love at first sight. What happens at first sight is pure infatuation. There's nothing between us, Felix, and there _never_ will be."

I emphasized the 'never' with austerity completely taking over my voice. My eyes didn't falter and neither did my voice. Our eyes locked and neither one of us dared to break our stare. My eyes held nothing but pure hatred that I had learned to feel for the Volturi while his contained nothing but genuine confusion.

"What happened to you when you came here, Bella? You were never like this before you left the Volturi."

"You're right but that's because they had my trained like their little puppy. I'm not that way anymore, Felix. I make my own decisions from now on."

His stare turned into an almost questioning look and then turned smug.

"So now your not listening to the Volturi because they were controlling you for your own good but instead, your listening to someone whose just met you and has absolutely no idea what you are truly capable of. The Cullen's aren't helping you, Bella. Look! They are nowhere in sight."

"No matter what you think, I can control my own powers thank you very much! They did teach me!"

"No, Bella, no they did not."

"Well I haven't killed _you_ yet so, obviously, I can control it."

My glare remained icy cold as I watched a range of emotions pass across his face. His face contorted with each emotion until anger and frustration finally won above all of them.

"You fell in love with one of them, didn't you?"

For the first time, I ran out of things to say. I hadn't expected that question to come and so I had no answer for him. I could answer him honestly and risk him hunting Edward down, or I could lie and have him wondering why I would never be with him. Felix's power was pure determination. When he wanted something, he wouldn't stop until he got it. He would never allow an obstacle in his way of his conquest. I, being his conquest, now had several obstacles in the way before he would be able to "conquer" me and the biggest one of all was Edward. The second biggest was the fact that no one would ever have my heart. I gave it all to Edward and his family. My eyes glazed over again giving it a frosty look and he just simply stared at me as my thoughts past through my mind. I looked down to the floor as I answered him.

"I fell in love with all of them."

He made a disgusted sound and jumped up from his sitting position near me so he could stare down at me as he stood just a couple of inches away.

"You want to be a part of that family? They are different from us, Bella. We are better than them. You deserve so much more."

I felt like a little girl confessing a sin to her parents.

"They're the only people who have ever given me what I have truly wanted. I couldn't have asked for better people to have stepped into my life. You don't understand, Felix, what it felt like to be a part of them, to be with them. They didn't keep secrets from one another. They helped each other with everything. They trusted each other with ease. The Volturi did _not_ teach me that."

I was still staring down at the green grass when his face suddenly appeared near mine. He took my hands in his and his breath rained on my ear as he whispered quietly.

"Which one did you fall in _love_ with, Bella?"

"I told you, Felix. I loved all of them."

"Yes. But which one brought you to the house? Which one told you that they were so much better that the Volturi? Who told you that they loved you and wanted to spend the rest of their life with you?"

My head snapped up and I glared into his eyes. My teeth showed themselves again and my eyes had slightly lightened. My voice was harsh and unconcerned.

"Does it honestly matter? I have already chosen to not be with_ you_ forever."

"But you have chosen to keep yourself for one of them?"

"Yes."

"Why, Bella?"

His voice was raised and infuriated. His red eyes flickered with fury and his unneeded breathing was irate.

"Because they are better than us in so many ways."

My voice held a noticeable deadly undertone to it. My eyes flashed up to meet his challengingly and I finally rose to stand up to him. He was taller than me but that didn't matter. My posture, my attitude, and my body all held firm and strong. My eyes became intense and our eyes locked. Slowly I moved into a crouching position, one that I went into before I started to fight. I was no longer in control of my senses, they were controlling me; however, not completely.

I started to circle him, my teeth beginning to show and the venom pouring into my mouth. The sounds, the smells and my sight all became sharper in an instant. My head started to pound with the sudden intensity of everything. My unnecessary breathing stopped. My form became more solid than a marble stone.

I watched his eyes widen in surprise. He was yelling at me, saying things, but his words were never registered in my head. The Volturi had taught me that when I began to hunt something, to completely block out anything they were saying, that way it would be easier to kill them and less remorse to deal with afterwards.

When he finally realized that his cries for help were not registering. He stood straight up and refused to meet my gaze. He was doing everything the Volturi had taught him to do just in case I lost control. His posture was so, that it did not offend me and trigger something off, this usually helped in calming me back down. The only problem was, that even thought the Volturi did not order me to kill him, I wanted to, and now there was no hope for him.

No matter what anyone did, I couldn't stop. Killing him was the only way to save the Cullen's. He already knew I fell in love with one of them, and he wouldn't stop until they were all dead. I was going to kill him before he could hurt anyone else.

In less than a nanosecond, I jumped on top of him, my teeth barely a centimeter from his neck. I felt his cold hands on my shoulders, trying to push me off but I effortlessly ignored his feeble attempts. He kept pushing at me but I stayed put, my teeth almost touching his thin skin.

My whole mind froze for a short period of time as my eyes searched for a suitable part to bite. As I moved in to bite his neck I heard something with my supersensitive ears; footsteps were headed toward me. Only one pair of footsteps could be heard but it suddenly clicked. Had Felix come alone or did the Volturi make him bring someone with him. Suddenly I pulled back, a roar erupting from my chest.

"Who did you bring with you?"

He shivered at first and winced at my loud voice. When he replied, it was nothing but a low whisper but was easily heard by my ears.

"I was told to come alone and call the Volturi if I needed help. I was sure I wasn't going to need any."

I grabbed his shirt and lifted him up to my face, scaring him.

"You wouldn't lie to me now would you?"

My voice was eerie and distant. My cold eyes never left his face. My mind raced thinking of every possibility of who it could be, what the possibilities were of one of the Cullen's coming. The likelihood of that possibility was very good. My eyes flashed with anger. They should have _all_ left. All of them should have disappeared by now. The venom that was pouring in my mouth started to coat my teeth.

Felix tried to pull back a little but I didn't allow him to move, I just listened as the footsteps came closer.

I looked at Felix straight in the eyes, amusement filling them.

"Well if it's not someone from the Volturi, then there is no reason I shouldn't kill you now, is there?"

He started to speak again but my selective hearing took over and all I could hear were the footsteps quickening and coming closer and closer.

I picked him up and threw him against the tree but gave him no room for an attempt to get up. I made it to the tree before his body even collided with it and as soon as his body made contact with it, he was thrown again.

My adrenaline was running all throughout my body. My senses heightened and my mind still clear. I ignored the footsteps. I could care less if someone was coming now. There was absolutely nothing that they could do to stop me.

After my few seconds of unnecessary tossing of Felix, I dragged him to an opening and placed my foot down hard on his chest making sure he could not escape. I leaned down to an almost sitting position over him and stared down at him.

"How does it feel to know that you're not in control?"

His head shook with frustration and my voice rose in anger. My body tensed into a cold statue.

"How does it feel to know that someone is controlling you and there is nothing you can do about it? No one is helping you. No one is going to save you. I'm the one controlling you now, not the other way around. Does it feel good? Do you feel like living with me for the rest of your life after I did this to you?"

He looked into my eyes, sadness consuming them. He shook his head 'no' and looked away.

"Then how can you expect me to go with you back to the Volturi with you after everything they have done to me?"

My voice unexpectedly softened. My body loosened and my face became gentler. My teeth were still coated with venom and my anger still consumed me. One of my hands gently brushed the side of his face.

"Felix, will you help me or are you still going to help the Volturi?"

My eyes burned into his and he was silent for a few seconds.

"Bella, I will always be with the Volturi."

Immediately my gentleness left my body. Anger, frustration and sadness consumed me. My lips completely pulled back. The hand that had once gently brushed across his cheek, wrapped itself strongly around his neck. I brought him up with me as I stood up and glared into his eyes.

"I'm sorry."

His whisper made it to my ears loud and clear but it did nothing to calm me down. I looked into his eyes gently for a long second only for my cold stare to come back to me.

"I'm sorry too."

It didn't take long for him to die. I moved quickly and stealthily, not allowing either one of us to make a sound for others to hear that where nearby. The footsteps I had heard earlier were almost here. I wasn't going to have anytime to burn his body. It probably wasn't going to be necessary considering the way I killed him and I never had to burn a body before but for someone reason I just had the urge to make sure he was dead. I wanted to make sure that there was no possible way that he could come back.

"Bella?"

His voice was soft, concerned, and distant. I turned around slowly not fully knowing what reaction he would give me.

I met his beautiful eyes instantly and I felt my body instantly weaken and collapse. My eyes filled with tears that would never be shed and my head spun from the sudden weakness. My sobs came out quietly and my body shook with each one. My hair fell around my face in a messy order.

He gathered me into his arms and pulled my head against his hard chest. He kissed my temple gently and whispered soothing things into my ear. As my sobs began to soften his hold on my never loosened, instead, he held on tighter and tighter.

When I finally gathered enough courage to look into his eyes, I almost regretted it. All I could see was pain in them. I quickly pulled my stare away from his eyes and back to the floor but I felt a finger under my chin guiding me to look back at him. I unwillingly did what he wanted me to do.

"Bella, I'm so sorry."

His voice was a soothing whisper and I closed my eyes as I he spoke to me.

"I wish you hadn't had to go through that. I didn't want to leave but Carlisle insisted that you wanted to leave me. I'm just glad that I came back for you."

His voice held nothing but concern and so I opened my eyes to look at him again.

"I didn't want you to come. You should have stayed with you family, Edward. It's not safe if you stay here with me. They're going to come after me now. Especially since…"

I didn't finish my sentence. My gaze shifted to Felix's dead form and I started to shake slightly again. I was scared for the first time in my life. I wasn't scared for my well being though, I was scared for the Cullen's.

He pulled my face with his hand back towards his form. His forehead gently rested on my own, his gaze suddenly intense. His eyes burned into mine and a stray finger started to brush light circles on my cheek.

"I love you, Bella. I can't leave you. I refuse to leave you."

I couldn't move and I couldn't think. He just held me, his face very close. One hand gently held the back of my neck while the other gently touched the side of my face. His gaze was breath taking and I couldn't think of anything to say. He just moved closer and closer. Our eyes never closed as he moved closer and closer until his lips gently made its way onto mine.

At first I did not move at all. My lips were a perfect smooth stone against his. At first his kiss was light but the minute I gave in and started to kiss him back, there were no more boundaries and he explored my mouth over and over again.

I wasn't sure how long we had been like that but when we broke apart to gaze into each others eyes, I knew I would never be able to look at anyone else again if I lost him. He was the one I wanted to spend eternity with. I would die if someone took him away from me.

He smiled his crooked smile and gently nuzzled the crook of my neck. When he pulled back he touched my cheek gently and kissed me again. This kiss wasn't as vigorous as the first, but it still caused my skin to crawl with desire and when he pulled back, I pulled him back into me. He wasn't going to have the final say this time; I still wasn't done with him.

After a while of long kisses, soft touches and loving words we broke apart and gazed into each others eyes knowingly. We would be like this forever now. There was no breaking us apart.

"Bella, my family is waiting for us."

I was shocked at his sudden statement. I would have thought that Edward came back alone, not with his whole family. Apparently, Edward read the shock on my face and laughed loudly.

"Bella, they love you too! You know that."

I smiled softly. I was definitely going to have to get used to this.

"I know and I love them too."

He smiled a huge smile back at me and excitement filled his eyes. He pulled me up and pulled me into his arms once again and kissed me passionately. When we pulled a part we were both dazed.

"I'm glad to hear that you feel that way."

I shivered at his semi hoarse voice and smiled when he took my hand in his. He started to take me somewhere, but I had absolutely no idea where his family was. I started to use my senses to try and find them but I couldn't. I looked up at him frantically but he just smiled.

"I did come alone to find you, but my family is at the place that I left them at. If the Volturi was here, I didn't want them to find my family too."

I stared into his eyes in a questioning manner.

"I can't live without you now, Bella. When will you be able to understand that?"

I couldn't respond to his question so after a short minute of brooding, I reached up on the tip of my toes and placed a light peck on his lips.

"I guess you're just going to have to keep telling me."

He smiled.

"I can do that."

That's when I knew. The Volturi coming was definite, my love for Edward was unyielding and the outlook of my future was ominous. Was I strong enough to defeat the monsters that created me? Would I be able to keep Edward safe? Would I be able to keep my new family protected? Would I have to die in order to keep the peace between both groups of powerful vampires?

"I love you, Edward."

I whispered quietly, still lost in my thoughts. I felt his questioning gaze on me while my eyes wandered aimlessly around my surroundings, far and distant as I thought sadly about my pending future.

"I love you _so_ much."

I muttered, my voice barely heard by my own ears.

**Phew! So that is Chapter 11 for everyone! I'm sorry it took so long but with finals and last minute soccer tournaments…I was unable to write at all! Please **_**REVIEW**_** and tell me what you thought. Hope you all enjoyed! It took _forever_ to write.**

**--Ditz4lyf**


	12. Chapter 12

**Suggestion Readings!**

**firehawk101****'s: **_**Timeless War**_-

It's different. It is unique. Read this story and review with your honest opinion. I believe it has some incredible potential.

**SkyCullen's**_**- The Way Idiots Really Run-**_

Amazing, Funny, and Hilarious. I love this story. A whole new Bella and Edward problem and not just the same 'Edward left Bella' again story. It's amazing. Read it and review for the author. Its awesome!

**Thanks To**

**smileon****- Again! Thank you for reviewing. Your review really helped me understand what my readers want. Thanks a bunch!**

**lost in romance****- I'm glad that last chapter was more to your liking! This chapter is mostly a filler but it becomes more exciting at the end. Please, tell me what you think about this one. You're reviews are always honest.**

**FangedMoonEyes****- LOVED your review. It made me happy!**

**blackirises****- Of course all of her problems will be with the Volturi but maybe I'll throw something in there to throw you off. Since a lot of people liked the little bit of action in last chapter, get ready for more, I'm not done yet.**

**excitingem555****- Again your exciting and different review caught my eye but it's kind of hard not to lol. Your suggestion has been taken into consideration. It did not happen this chapter but I'm thinking next chapter, you'll have a lot of flash backs.**

**Transfiguration- You're review was muchly appreciated and I'm not going to tell you the answer to your question. You're going to have to keep on reading to find out! Lol!**

**bookaholic502****- Thank you so much for your review. I'm glad that my last chapter kept you waiting for this chapter and I can only hope that this chapter does the same. Please tell me.**

**xoambahmariexo****- Ugh. Writers block is not going to be a problem now. The only problem will be my trip to Hungary. Read the bellow authors note when you finish the story. I won't update for a while! tears**

**firehawk101****- I'm glad you liked my story. I read your story and reviewed it. Again, if you need help, email me. I'm always up to help ANYONE. You're story was new and different. Keep up the work!**

**Special, Special, Special Thanks To:**

**SkyCullen****-You always help me! You're amazing! Thank you for editing. Tell me what you think. You edited a part of the story but I don't think you were expecting the ending. Read it and tell me what you thought! I really liked this ending but I really would like your input!**

**Again THANK YOU to EVERYONE who REVIEWED. I received many reviews last chapter and **_**I hope I can beat 18 reviews (the amount I received this chapter**_** So PLEASE REVIEW.**

It was a long run to Edward's family. They where meeting us at an airport somewhere but everything had happened so fast when Edward came, and I had been so lost in my thoughts, that I had no idea where we were located. Once we were in the airport, I was crushed by hugs from both Alice and Emmett. Jasper just gave me one huge smile as well as Rosalie. Esme threw her arms around me and scolded me for leaving her. Carlisle was hesitant at first but managed to put an arm around my shoulder and told me how happy he was to have me as part of the family and then threw Edward a look. Edward just smiled happily and grabbed me from Carlisle. "What? I couldn't just leave her" he said.

Now, as I was reunited with my family and on an airplane going to who knows where, I was happy and calm. Alice had told me more than a dozen times where Carlisle had decided to go but each time I forgot. My brain was most definitely _not _functioning at this moment.

The whole family was seated in the first class area with only one or two stray passengers with us. Edward sat next to me and allowed me to sit in the seat next to the window. I had told him it really didn't matter where I sat but he insisted that I should be able to have the window seat because that was his favorite seat but I was his most prized possession and therefore, I had to sit there. I laughed at his craziness but did as I was told.

I looked down out the window not being able to see anything but dark clouds down below. I stared down at it, my thoughts still jumbled in my head. Ever since I've been back with Edward, I haven't been able to form one coherent thought. So many "what ifs" and "buts" filled my head.

"Really ominous looking isn't it?"

Edward's lips moved gently on my neck and so I just nodded, unable to speak at the moment. I was having trouble enough at this moment with forming a coherent thought without Edward's lips on my neck. I was incapable of thinking when his lips were on my neck. I shuddered softly as he pushed a little closer.

"What's wrong, Bella?"

My eye brows furrowed together in genuine confusion and I still couldn't speak so I just let silence answer him. When I didn't answer him, he pulled back, his beautiful face annoyed and angry.

"It's not that I'm not going to answer you, but I can _not _form a sentence when you have your lips pressed to my neck like that. I can't even _think_."

Suddenly, a smile replaced his frowning face.

"That's good to hear."

I glared at him and he just laughed quietly. I started to gaze out the window again but he stopped me with a gentle finger and pulled my face close to his. He didn't say a word; he just stared intensely into my eyes. His finger slowly outlined my jaw as he memorized my face with his concentrated stare.

"Everything is going to be fine, Bella. _Everything_."

As soon as he said those words, his eyes flashed to mine to try and read what I was thinking. My face and eyes were impassive and I just nodded my head. He let out a frustrated sigh.

"I'm still not used to not being able to hear your thoughts. It bothers me."

I smiled at him gently but he stared back at me, his face showing no emotion. I turned back to stare out my window.

"Sometimes I'm glad you can't hear my thoughts."

I didn't mean to say those words out loud, much less let Edward hear them. My voice was sad and hurt and he immediately pulled my shoulders around so he could stare at me in disbelief.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Nothing. It was a mistake. I'm sorry."

His gaze only sharpened, his eyes narrowed and his mouth became stern. He wouldn't allow me to look anywhere but into his eyes. We stayed like that for a long moment. For a brief second I caught Carlisle staring at us but I was forced to look back at Edward. His forehead creased and his angry face turned gentler and sadder.

"You're still worried about the outcome of this, aren't you?"

My eyes gazed into his and I watched the sadness fill them. He let go of me and laid back into his seat, eyes closed. I looked past him toward Carlisle who sent me an apologetic look. I smiled sweetly as I mouthed 'thank you' to him. I turned back to Edward whose face still held the pain he was feeling and I grabbed his hand gently. I twined my fingers with his but he wouldn't open his eyes. He then put a death lock on my hand brought it to his lips leaving light kisses on it.

For the rest of the plane ride, Edward and I sat that way, his lips on my hand as he held it close to him and his eyes never once opening. When it was time to get off the plane, he opened his eyes but still wouldn't look at me. He just held my hand tightly as we walked out of the plane and followed his family to a get a cab.

Alice and Rosalie insisted that I go with them to the mall so I could get some clothes. Although I tried to get out of the torture they were going to put me through, I ended up going, leaving Edward and the rest of his family at the airport as they found a place they could rent out.

Alice bought _everything_ in practically _every_ store while Rosalie cheered on right beside her and occasionally pulled out one or two things for me that Alice hadn't already chosen. I was thrown into every dressing room with every pair of clothing, modeling them off to Alice and Rosalie.

Usually both of them wore huge smiles and applauded happily when I came out but I did get some occasional disgusted looks and the clothes were quickly put back onto the shelves.

Alice's phone rang and I heard her receiving directions on how to get to the place the rest of the rest of the family rented out. She smiled at me as she hung up her phone.

"I guess that's enough shopping for today. The family is waiting for us at a house they rented a couple of miles a way."

We quickly paid for the clothes and waited outside for Emmett to pick us up in his overly sized car. The car ride was noisy with Alice sitting next to me singing every song that came on the radio at the top of her lungs, Rosalie and Emmett screaming at her to shut up, and the windows rolled down creating an obnoxious noise. Once we got out of the car my head was screaming and I looked as if I was about to be sick.

It was then that I realized, the reason I had been out of it all day was because I needed food. With everything that had been going on, trying to control my senses and fighting Felix, I was completely starved.

I wanted something fast. I wanted something human. I wasn't going to be able to live with the Cullen's and drink human blood though and I didn't know what to do. Suddenly, my eyes sight became fuzzy and then almost instantly sharpened. The smells all around me became intense and the ache in my throat was unendurable.

My eyes quickly searched for someone, something very close but the house was out of the city and back amongst the forest. I was crouched down the smells making life the most sickening thing ever. My head began to spin and I felt to arms try and pull me up but my body wouldn't budge.

My eyes closed allowing me to fully rely on my hearing and smell. Two cool hands gently grabbed my face and started to trace cool circles on my cheek. In a flash my hand grabbed his wrists tightly and at the same time my eyes flashed open. I saw Edward try and pull back in shock but my hold wouldn't allow him to move.

Carlisle moved behind Edward and stared into my eyes. I heard everyone talking so loud in my head that my head ache started to worsen and I saw Carlisle shooting everyone warning looks to be quite.

When everyone was quite I closed my eyes again feeling Edwards's hands on my face once again. I felt him push his forehead lightly against mine. Although my head still wasn't clear, I felt myself slowly gaining control of my senses and my death grip on Edward's hand became soft as it moved up and down his arms. I leaned into him pushing my head into the crook of his neck.

My unnecessary breathing was irate and it was hard to speak with the ache in the back of my throat. When I spoke it sounded as if something was stuck in the back of my throat.

"Edward, I need something."

He nodded his head, his cool breathing in my ear.

"Food?"

I didn't respond, I just nodded my head. He kissed my neck gently and held onto me tighter. He pulled a way slightly to look at my face and then traced it with his index finger.

"You scared me."

I laughed sadly, my eyes still closed and answered him, pain and hated eminent in my voice.

"Yeah, I scared myself too."

He then pulled me up with him and kissed me passionately on the lips. When I pulled back and looked into his eyes, I couldn't look away. His eyes held nothing but love in them and I felt goose bumps roll up my arms. Edward smiled his crooked smile, noticing what had happened.

"I love you and I will _always_ love you."

He grabbed my hand and pulled me into the forest and began to teach me how to hunt something that was not human. It was difficult. The blood was disgusting and I detested it but if it was a sacrifice I was going to have to make in order to be with him, I would do it.

When we were done hunting, he brought me back to the house that was rented. When we entered the door and went into the living room, I felt everyone's eyes on me. I pulled myself behind Edward and out of everyone's sight. He laughed quietly and I heard Emmett speak.

"How did it go?"

"It went well."

Edward still didn't move, he just stood there quietly in a long silence. I started to pull my hand out of his so I could march up the stairs and try and find my room but he turned around, put his arms around my waist and pulled me into one of the rooms upstairs.

Once we were in the room and Edward unlocked his arms from around my waist to close the doors I stared at him.

"Whose room is this?"

"This is our room of course. Whose room were you planning on being in?"

I turned my cold glare on him for a second.

"My room of course."

My sarcastic remark did not sway him from his surprisingly good mood that had left him in the airport.

"Why would you want that when you have the chance to spend every second with me?"

"Who says I want to spend every minute of every day staring at your ugly, nasty, disgusting, repulsive, sickening, nauseating self."

He winced playfully and started to walk toward me with some unknown glint in his eyes. I backed away from him only to find myself bumping into the wall and a never-before-seen smile made its way onto his playful face. He stopped barely and inch away from me.

"I know you want to spend every minute of every day for the rest of eternity with me."

I raised one eye brow in a questioning and defensive manner. My tone became challenging and I started to play part in what ever he was doing.

"You do? Who told you that? They are terribly mistaken. I'm sorry. I think you need a new resource."

His smile widened but he didn't move any closer, he just stared for a long moment into my eyes. It was a comforting silence that fell between us, his eyes still holding the unknown glint.

"No. I'm pretty sure they knew what they were talking about."

"And I'm pretty sure they don't." 

"Maybe I need to jog your memory then?"

He leaned in and kissed me deeply; his hands holding me close so that there was no way to escape. His lips felt smooth and comfortable against mine and I completely lost all of my will to be defiant towards him. My hands went around his form pulling him closer to me. His hold on me was the only thing keeping me up.

His lips left mine, finding their way down my neck. I hid my face in the crook of his neck as waves of pleasure ran over me. I began to wonder, if this is what I felt now, what would I feel if we did other things? He was the only person in the world who could possible drive me crazy and he knew it.

He pulled back abruptly his eyes staring at my swollen lips where I could still feel the ghost of his lips on mine. He smiled at me and I stared back at him.

"I thought you didn't want to spend any time with me much less look at me."

I smiled playfully and pulled him closer to me.

"We have our eyes closed. I don't have to stare at you and I can make believe you're someone else."

He sent me a disgusted look and all I could do was laugh hysterically. When I finally calmed down he rested his head against my shoulder just like a little boy would to his mom.

I put my arms around him and held him. He pulled his arms around my waist and lifted me up onto the bed. My eyes widened in shock and met his eyes instantly when he went to lay beside me, propped up on one elbow while the other hand cupped my face slowly.

He stared at me for a brief second before he pushed his whole entire body on top of me. His lips where on mine almost immediately as his hands wandered everywhere. It felt uncomfortable and brilliant all at the same time. I wasn't sure how to react and I just laid there, my head on the pillow, as I felt Edward kiss my neck and collarbone.

With ease he took off his shirt and mine too, kissing every inch of open skin that his eyes could see. His lips quickly transitioned from my lips to my body and back to my lips. Sometimes he let me hold his close and other times he would grab my wrists and hold them above my head while he would kiss me fiercely.

I wasn't sure how long this had gone on but he never went any lower and I was glad for that. I didn't like the fact that he was in charge. It bothered me that he was the only one that was being allowed to explore. He had an excellent body, and he was mine.

I used most of my strength to push him over so I was on top of him. He tried to roll back over but I wouldn't let him. He stared at me confused and bewildered but when I just smiled at him he couldn't help but laugh as I stared at his well defined body.

I touched every muscle that I could see and he became way too eager to receive my attention. He watched me as I worked and smiled at me every time our eyes met. After a moment that felt like forever, he pulled me up to him. He pushed himself back on top of me and smiled down at my partially covered body.

"This is what I want my forever to be like."

I looked into his eyes for a moment, trying to read what was passing through his mind. I traced his lips with my finger.

"I want my forever to be like this too."

He smile happily and gave me a strong, passionate kiss on the lips once again. When he pulled back I smiled at him and hit him over the head with a pillow. He stared at me surprised for a moment but quickly enough, his face turned playful. I laughed quietly and pushed him off me.

"Get dressed!"

He grabbed his shirt and put it on. When he noticed my shirt, he grabbed it as well but instead of handing it to me, he stared at it and then smiled. When his eyes reached mine he leaned back against the wall. I got off the bed and walked toward him but he just shook his head.

"I like this shirt so I think I'm going to keep it."

I stared at him in disbelief and reached for it. He pulled it away and shook his head. He walked over to our closed and pulled out one of his shirts and tossed it to me.

"Wear this one."

I glared at him but he just looked back at me unfazed. I shook my head in disbelief but took it from his hand anyway and put it on. He smiled down at me approvingly.

"I like that shirt on you."

I smiled wryly.

"Well good because I like it on me too so you're not getting it back."

I opened the bedroom door and walked down the stairs with Edward following right behind me. Emmett, Jasper and Carlisle were the only people in the living room when I got down stairs.

Emmett almost immediately smiled at me and then patted to the seat next to him but I followed his orders anyway. He tossed me a game controller and smiled.

"No one else will play with me. Will you?"

I laughed and shook my head 'yes' while Edward sat on the armrest next to me. Jasper rested in front of the couch acting as a reporter and was kicked twice by Emmett for announcing bad news. Carlisle stood behind us telling us how bad this game was for us.

We began to argue with Carlisle telling him it had no effect on our minds but when Edward went on Carlisle's side, it became an all out war. Carlisle's phone rang and so we all stopped shouting so Carlisle could speak. Esme, Rosalie, and Alice entered into the living room from the sudden awkward silence that filled the house, not even Carlisle spoke.

Carlisle looked scared and astonished. He slowly looked at me, sadness consuming his face. He handed me the phone looking like he was in some sort of daze. I took it quietly, not quite sure who was on the other line.

When I put the phone to my ear I didn't speak. My mind was racing for any thoughts as to who could have made Carlisle react in such a way. As I thought, I only came to one conclusion.

When I spoke into the phone, my voice was masked by a cold, distant, and demanding voice.

"Hello?" 

"Bella! Oh, how I have missed you! Where are you, Bella? We want you home. What happened to Felix? I found his body a few moments ago."

If I had felt frightened before, I felt absolutely nothing but determination and resistance now.

"I have no idea. What happened to him? I haven't even seen him since I left the Volturi."

My voice was one of genuine surprise, the years and years of training kicking in all over again.

"You're good, Bella. How can I trust that you do not know what happened, much less, how do I know that you did not do this?"

"Do what? I'm sorry Jane but I am terribly confused. I think you need to clarify what you're talking about."

There was a long silence on the phone as if she was debating on whether or not to tell me what happened.

"You're with the Cullen's."

"Of course I am. This is Carlisle's phone."

"Why are you with them?"

"I'm trying to convince Carlisle to come with me but he is an awfully hard man to convince. I'm sorry Jane dear but you're going to have to give me more time."

"Bella, you killed Felix!"

I smiled.

"Yes, I did."

"You're going to die now you know that, right?"

My voice became ice cold. My eyes turned light blue, the color of ice that a glacier would hold. My hand turned into fists at my sides.

"Who's going to kill me, Jane? You? How many times did you try and kill me at the Volturi because I took your place and none of them even fazed me! Try and find me, Jane, because when you do, there's going to be hell to pay!"

**Oki doki! So here is another one! I'm going to try and update before **_**July 5**__**th**__** because I am going to be flying to Hungary to visit some relatives there and I fly back on the 18**__**th**_**. I will NOT be able to write in Hungary unless you want to read the story in Hungarian. I'm sorry if there will be a long break. I'll try my best to not let that happen! ****PLEASE REVIEW!**

**Also, I have a new homepage up. If you want to add me if you can.**

**--Ditz4lyf**


	13. Chapter 13

**Thanks to the many reviews I received from last chapter and me finally being able to sit at home for two hours to write….here is your next chapter. : ) Hope you enjoy.**

I snapped the phone shut. My temper flared like a wild fire raging out of control. I felt Jasper trying to calm me down and I sent him a stern glare. Immediately he stopped and stared at me confused. The whole family was silent, waiting for me to give them the news on what had happened over the phone. I looked into each and every one of their faces, saving Edward's for last, knowing that once I looked into his eyes, I would tell them everything.

His eyes were soft and pleading. He knew what had happened over the phone had upset me greatly and he was afraid that I would leave, which is exactly what I was planning on doing.

"Jane knows I killed Felix. She doesn't know where I am right now at this moment but I know exactly where she is and I want to kill her. She is definitely communicating to Aro and the others right now. The Volturi will be at your house in Forks by tomorrow night."

My eyes locked with Edwards during my whole announcement, watching as the emotions played across his face. When I was finished, I knew the look in his eyes. He wasn't about to let me go back to Forks. He would come and I knew it. He wouldn't just let me finish her off and do what I pleased when the Volturi arrived. It was a stupid decision to make.

I was practically the definition of indestructible. Any little tests the Volturi had put me through, even when it was against more than 10 vampires, I had always won. That's why I had taken Jane's spot in the Volturi. My statistics were 350 better than hers. She had always tried to fight back and regain her position but her attempts were nothing more than amusing. If Edward would come, he would make me weaker because I would have to worry about keeping him safe, and I wouldn't be focusing. He needed to stay here along with the rest of his family.

"Bella, I don't want you to go there. They don't know where we are. They won't be able to find us."

Alice's voice was nothing more than an extremely low whisper. Her eyes were sad and filled with grief. My eyes barely looked at her though. I couldn't give into her. I couldn't give into anyone. They had never had anyone like the Volturi pursue them before, especially when they had something that the Volturi so desperately wanted. They would, without a doubt, find them and either kill me or take me away.

"I have to."

I noticed how my hand shook slightly at my side and how Edward took my hand in his noticing it as well. I sat in his lap, realizing that I was still standing and leaned into Edwards embrace. I didn't know if this relationship could last any longer and I wanted to enjoy every touch for as long as I could.

"Okay, Bella. Then I'm coming with you. I'm not about to let you go out there all by yourself. I want to have some fun too. You're _not_ just going to get away by telling me stories about all the fights once you get back. I want to have a part too!"

Emmett sounded like he was a whining two year old and I glared at him. He smiled childishly and walked over to where I sat with Edward and sat beside the two of us.

"I can't let the newest addition to our family outshine me. It just wouldn't be right, Bella."

I laughed for a brief moment.

"I already have, Emmett."

Jasper laughed at that and received a pillow in the face from Emmett who glared at me with pure playful disgust. Edward was still holding on to me like I was his life line but he seemed to be more at ease right now as he chuckled quietly at our playful banter.

"Well, if Emmett gets to go, I do too!"

Alice smiled devilishly as she looked at Emmett.

"No! Alice, you get to do _everything_ with Bella and I get to do nothing on my own. What happened to some Emmett to Bella bonding time? There is _plenty_ of Alice to Bella bonding time but I have never had time with her. That's not fair!"

I smacked Emmett over the head, playfully, but with a stern force and I received a growl from Emmett which I gladly returned.

"First of all, Emmett, I never said that you were going to come with me, I just though it was fun to hear you talk. Secondly, _no one_ is going to come with me!"

Edward's voice cut in as soon I spoke my second case and almost made me jump right out of his lap as his eyes looked at me directly when he spoke.

"Lastly, you're not going anywhere so there is nothing to worry about. We can all just settle down and wait until Alice sees something."

My eyes hardened when they met Edward's.

"You know I can't wait. I'm part of your family now and I have to do what ever I can to protect you all from disgusting things like the Volturi! I am not going to let them harm anyone. I have to leave and do this myself. You guys will just become a weakness if you come with me."

Edward growled but Carlisle shook his head in agreement.

"You are Aro's favorite are you not?"

I looked at Carlisle suspiciously but nodded in agreement.

"Then I do not believe he will let Jane harm you. You need to go alone. We will become a nuisance if we come along with you. What do you plan on doing?"

I smiled, my lips curling over my teeth.

"I thought so."

Emmett jumped up off the couch and paced back and forth.

"How is there no way that we can help. I have to be able to do something! What if Bella gets hurt? Who is going to help her?"

"Who is going to hurt me, Emmett? You can not really think the Volturi can harm me!"

"They might still have control over you! You still have trouble with that. You always will! You know that!"

I sighed in frustration. Emmett was right, for once. The Volturi had me around their fingers for so long. It was odd. I was indestructible and yet so gullible. How can both of these things coexist with one another in harmony, in one form? The only thing that the two can create together is havoc.

That was when I realized how alike Jane and I both were. We both were gullible and we were both very strong. The difference between the two of us, I was stronger. I was more powerful. I was more of a threat. That's why the Volturi took such good care of me. They knew that I could turn on them and if I did, the trouble I would cause them would be vast. That's why the Volturi trained me so much more than everyone else, to have a firmer hold on me.

"Bella, are you okay?"

Jasper was leaning forward waving his hand in front of my frozen face. I felt him calming the atmosphere but this time I allowed him too.

"I have to do this on my own."

I had said it in a barely audible whisper but once the words had escaped, all the talking in the room was silent.

Maybe it was the way my voice sounded, maybe it was the way I looked, or maybe it was just the fact that my mind was still lost in my thoughts and my eyes unreadable that the whole room couldn't find the words to object.

Slowly my head turned to Carlisle who only nodded toward me in an understanding manner. I rose, my eyes still glazed over because I hadn't fully recuperated from my last thought and took a few steps forward.

"Bella?"

Edward sounded as if he was about to lose the only thing in life that mattered. I turned slowly and met his gaze. He beautiful eyes met mine with such concern and pleading that it almost snapped me out of my daze, but I loved him. I needed to protect him.

"If I don't leave, Edward, I may just become a threat to this family. Emmett's right. I have to learn how to go against everything the Volturi has done to me. If I don't come back it's because I can't do it and I am better of to you dead. If I come back, I'm not a threat to this family and I will never leave you again."

My voice was soft and pleading. I needed him to understand that I wasn't leaving for pure enjoyment. I really did need to do this. I loved him but I wouldn't stay if I was going to inflict upon him and his family unnecessary danger. This was my final test. This was the last test I would receive from the Volturi and I would make sure of that.

**--Ditz4lyf**

**I haven't updated in a while (check)  
This is a short chapter (check)**

**I will update within the next five days (CHECK)**

**Sorry I have taken an eternity to update. I'm going into my junior year and I'm being sentenced to many showcases with my soccer team. Apparently I'm not that bad at soccer and that's good to know. I've received many emails from colleges that count telling me that they are interested! Yay for me! I will update soon! Thank you for sitting out the long wait.**


	14. Chapter 14

I couldn't really tell you how I got back to Forks. The drive to the airport, the long and obnoxious security check point, the intolerably silent flight home and the cold rain greeting me once again as it splattered all over me like a reminder to let me know I was back where I belonged. The weather matched the ominous atmosphere. The dark, menacing clouds and earsplitting thunder didn't even faze me. My mind was still in a haze; my thoughts drifting constantly back to my family, back to Edward. I had to be with him. I couldn't live for the rest of an eternity without him now that I knew that someone like him existed. That there was actually someone out there, whom was just like me, who loved me the way I loved him.

If I lost this battle, I would lose Edward. I would lose the only reason to live, the only reason to exist. I would lose everything. If I lost this battle, it wouldn't be just my freedom I would lose, just my whole entire point to live. However, if I won, I would be strong enough to return to my family. I would be able to return home and start a new life with someone that I fell deeply in love with. I had everything to lose or everything to gain. There was no middle part for me. I had to win or else I would live in misery and torment for the rest of time.

Goosebumps traveled up my arm. The thought to be so lonely once again and separated from the one thing that you so desperately needed to be with was intolerable and an unimaginable concept to grasp.

I realized I was just standing there, at the front of the small airport. My clothes were soaked with rain, my hair stuck to the sides of my face. For once I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready play with fate. If I went and fate had already decided I would lose this battle I would once again be the Volturi's puppet and my family most likely killed. But, on the other hand, if fate had already decided that I would win I would be able to return home and live for the rest of eternity in nothing but sweet bliss and love. Although the winnings sounded magical and all around just very appealing, there was just too much to lose if fate had already chose so. There was so much to lose. There was so much to gain.

It was here and now where I wished all time could just stop, where I had everything, and nothing. I had Edward. I had my family. I had the Volturi all over my back. But I had what I wanted most ……And at the same time, I had my past haunting and crushing every attempt to have a free and better future.

I shut my eyes tight and pictured Edward's face for the last time. I had to be strong. I had to be indestructible. I couldn't allow one sign of weakness. I was going to win. I needed to win. When my eyes finally opened, there was no more Edward. There was no more family. I had nothing but hatred running through my veins. The past few months I spent with the Cullen's fully erased. Any softness that once played across my face so beautifully now became hard and subtle features, my posture straight, my eyes penetrating and my mouth was as motionless and stern as a stone. I would become everything the Volturi taught me to be: cold, brutal, indestructible, and most of all effective. I would change everything. I was going to take the monster they created and turn it back on them. I would make them fear me, make them listen. They would understand. I no longer lived by there rules nor their games. I was everything they made me to be. I was a monster and they would now listen to me.

I ran swiftly back to the house where everything had started and ironically where everything would end. When I arrived there was an odd silence that filled the air, an eerie and cryptic mood that seemed to be lingering around the house. My sense heightened as I laid my palm down gently on the cool grass.

I couldn't feel a thing. There was no sign of life. There was no sign of Jane. It was too quite. She was expecting me. I could sense it. She wanted me to follow by her rules but that's just the thing. I never abided by any rules not even when I did work for the Volturi. I smile audaciously. She was playing this game by my rules and she didn't even know it. I had been trained continuously day after day after day 

to become the ultimate hunter. My senses were more sensitive then any vampire, my speed faster than any vampire; my hunting skill incredibly outnumbered any one. Maybe this would be easier than I thought.

I swiftly and silently began to move through out Forks. I was like a ghost. I was there and yet I was not, never staying in one spot for more than an unbearably long half of a second. I had to find Jane.

It didn't take long to find her. Jane stood silently on edge deep in the forest. She didn't know I was here. My face only hardened, the sharpness of my features becoming brutally beautiful. Venom slowly filled my mouth and my senses were as high as they had ever been. I was virtually aware of everything going on in Forks.

I jumped down from the tree landing about 30 meters away from where Jane stood. My landing was silent and perfect. My gentle leap didn't even reach her ears.

"Jane, I missed you."

My voice severed the tense atmosphere like nails on a chalk board, unnerving and very unsettling. She whirled around and looked at me. Her face was hard and emotionless but her eyes were wide and alarmed.

"I expected you would come and find me."

"So I noticed."

Her eyebrows raised and then smoothed across her face.

"Aro has missed you very much. It's time you come back with us. Don't think I'm telling you this because I want you with us but everyone else can't seem to live without you. I think we should just kill you and get it over with. I'd love to just do it _myself._"

A wicked smile flashed across my face and suddenly I threw my head back laughing eerily, the sound daring and strange. My laughter came to a startling end, my face wicked smile still glued onto my face, my eyes now twinkling with a dare, a challenge.

"You would just_ love_ that?"

My enthusiastic smile no longer played amongst my face but instead hardened back into a cold stare but my eyes still twinkled with raw enthusiasm and sweet delight. The venom in my mouth started increasing. I never felt so powerful before, so indestructible, so _lethal_.

"You would never stand a chance against me, Jane. Don't be stupid. Let's not say petty little things that will do nothing more than just excite me. Let's take things nice and slow. Maybe I'll let you go…"

"You think you're so much better than any of us. You think you're so much more powerful than the Volturi put together. You're wrong. They will find you and kill you. They will find the Cullen's and kill them. You betrayed us._ You're_ the one that's going to die, Bella, not me."

A gentle smirk played across my features. I heard her cell phone ring and she picked it up.

"Yes."

"She is here."

She eyed me angrily and threw me the phone. My smirk only grew as I caught the cell phone with ease and glared back at her… my patience wearing out.

I didn't ask who it was on the phone I was speaking to. It would only be one person. I waited a second prolonging the moment. I knew as soon as I heard the voice Jane would be good as dead. I knew the voice still had control of me but this time, it was in a whole different way. It no longer held on to me as it had once before. It only made my cold blood boil, my teeth clench together, and an impending doom for those that I met and tried to cross me that had any association with this person.

"Bella, are you there?"

I only grunted in response as my senses started to tingle at the sound of Aro's voice, my eyes wild and excited.

"If you listen to Jane you'll only make thing easier for yourself as well as the Cullen's. There's no need to be irrational about this, Bella. Return to us now and we will pretend like this never happened."

"I'm sorry, Aro. I'm afraid this time you're too late. You see, I'm not quite as obedient as I have once been. Jane is as good as dead. I'll be waiting for you. I'm not going anywhere. In fact, I have a surprise for you. Hurry over here. I can't wait to show you all the cool things I have learned."

My eyes narrowed and my senses were tingling with a crazy sensation that I had never felt before. My hand turned into a fist which crushed the phone. My eyes met hers. She looked at me eyes wide and horrified. Her mouth dropped a little.

"What has happened to you?"

A hateful and daring smirk shot across my face.

"I'm only playing the person the Volturi _always_ wanted me to be but here's the catch…"

Suddenly, I stood in front of her, my lips just a centimeter away from her ear and my body slightly pressed against hers. Everything was still. Even Jane couldn't dare try to move away from me even at the close and uninviting proximity we were to one another. I waited, allowing suspense to take full hold of my prey. When I spoke, my voice was barely audible to even my ears but I know that Jane heard it because of the silent gasp she let out.

"…this time I'm not on your side."

Before she could even react I threw her heavily to the ground, my foot pressing hard against her chest. I eyed her menacingly.

"Even though it's not _your_ fault the Volturi made me to be this way you would never just leave me alone. You would always try and hunt me down or hurt anyone that was close to me which isn't your fault either because the Volturi trained you to do that. I'm giving you a single chance to change. It's not _you_ I want to kill, Jane, but it's all about sending a message, about proving a point. Answer me now and chose wisely because the only other choice you have is death."

For a second her face was troubled, as if she were actually contemplating my offer and for a second I actually had hope that maybe instead of killing everyone, some could be changed. That belief quickly disappeared as soon as her face hardened and she let out a nasty hiss.

"Remember, Jane. _You _chose this."

Within seconds I had her once complete body lying in a heap beside me like a puzzle waiting to be put back together. I threw some gasoline on the pile and then set it on fire. This would be only the first of many to come but I had to do it. It's ironic that the one thing I'm trying to run away from, the monster inside me is the only thing that is going to keep me alive now…


	15. Chapter 15

I watched the fire intently. A fire that is controlled is a safe one; while on the other hand, a fire that is let lose to run free can cause major chaos and mass destruction. I now wondered if perhaps I was a wild fire causing a major disruption or if it was the Volturi who needed to be contained. I knew what I was fighting for but I didn't know if it made it right. The Volturi had been selfish for so long, commanding me around like a puppet to carry out their orders. Would I be forgiven for finally doing what I wanted for once or would I be looked down upon whenever I crossed another vampire? Would they look at me and sneer or cower in fear afraid that I will take their life out of nothing but pure game? When I looked into the mirror or a puddle of water on the floor, would I know who I had become? Could I look at myself and be and thing, "you did the right thing; you did what should have been done a long time ago".

Love really will make people do crazy things. Love can turn an emotionless machine into an affectionate and personable being. It gives life to that who have lost it and that's what had happened to me. In one aspect with me being a vampire, I had lost life. I don't breathe or age but instead I just live on and on for all of eternity watching the living. However, in an emotional and mental sense, I was dead as well. The Volturi had sucked out any piece of life that I had left in me. They took the last thing that truly made me who I was before I became this monster. They took the very last bit of humanity away from me, something that the Cullen's had given me back. So I did have the right to stand up to the Volturi. I did have the right to move into the Cullen's household and gain that humanity back. I wanted to be loved and to love someone. I wanted a family. I wanted a tender touch, a raspy voice to whisper in my ear, a gentle caress on my cheek. For so long I thought I was this stone. I believed I was perfect. I _knew _that _nothing_ could ever stop me from completing a mission. And then there was love and once I encountered it, I lost completely and miserably to it.

I learned I could be human and that just because I was a vampire there was still some humanity left in me, I just needed to find it. I would not lose it and Aro wanted to take it from me.

I will kill him.

I will kill him for everything he has taken from me, for all the things he lied to me about, for all the things he used me to do, for the monster he created me to be, for threatening me new family, and for trying to take away my true love. I will not allow it. I will kill myself if he takes the Cullen's from me. If they go, I will go.

I didn't know how far the Volturi was going to take this. Would they send more people to try and convince me to come back "home" or was Aro just going to let things be. I had no more answers at this point. Everything was new to me. The Volturi never trained me for a situation like this. Usually if a member or the Volturi went rogue, they were terminated. With no questions asked. But I was far too strong and valuable.

Miles away I heard a twig snap and quick movement and yet my mind was still in a daze, my senses still on edge, and my thoughts continued to run rampant. All I could see before me was the blazing fire and the flames dancing in every which way. I just thought that if I were to die, this would be my grave. And yet it was calming. Anywhere, even under the burning touch of a flame, would be better than under the care or the Volturi.

Suddenly there was a loud crack from high in the sky and then I felt the first water droplet fall onto my face. The usual forecast in Forks but it was still surprising considering for the last hour and a half there had been no rain allowing the fire to burn what was left of Jane's body. The running footsteps were closer now, probably less than a mile away. For some reason I wasn't alarmed this time. I couldn't seem to snap out of my trance. My eyes glued to the dying fire and my mind on calculating the Volturi's next move. The smell of rain was just so calming and the music that the thunderstorms just put me into this very relaxed mood. The coolness of the rain helped to calm my nerves and so there was nothing right now that bothered me. Not even the person that had stopped running and I knew stood two yards from me. Somehow I just knew it wasn't threatening. Hesitantly, the person began to speak.

"I know, Bella, that you had asked me not to come. I know why and I do understand why you requested that but I can't. As soon as you left, I lost a piece of me. You're part of my family and much more. You are my everything, Bella. If I have to live for an eternity, I want to do it with you. "

Suddenly, I felt pressure along my back and arms wrapped around my body as a face nudged itself into the side of my neck. Edward pushed my drenched hair to the side and ran his nose up and down my neck. I felt chills climb up my spine when his lips gently met my neck. His kiss was so fast and light that I almost thought that I was imagining things. He turned me around and looked deep into my eyes.

"I will not lose this and I will do anything I can to keep it. I think we both deserve this if we have to live for an eternity don't you, Bella?"

He was so close to me, both of us drenched, our clothes practically see through. Our eyes staring deeply into the others reading every single thought and feeling that went through the others head. Our bodies were pressed tightly around one another and our arms wrapped tightly around one another. We were both breathing heavily despite the fact that we didn't need to breathe.

This is when I realized that this feeling was more than love. We were more than soul mates. In every sense of the word, Edward was my other half. Without him, I was incomplete. I needed him for support and comfort. We were, without a doubt, made purposely for one another. It took us many years to find each other but now that we did, it was impossible to lose, let alone leave the other for even a short period of time. Without our other half, we couldn't live. Without any further hesitation I answered Edward's question with such firmness I knew that he would know that I knew exactly what he meant.

"Yes, Edward, we do."

All I remember is one second I was staring deeply into Edward's beautiful ocher eyes and the next his body pressed against me tightly when he threw me against a tree, his mouth never leaving mine and his hands exploring my body in a magical way. For the first time we could express everything we truly felt for one another. Ironically enough, we only had the strength to do it when there was pending doom.

There was a beautiful mix of passion and force and our bodies entangled around one another. We could become one easily and with such fluid motion that it there was no doubt we were meant to be. Never in my life had I felt so much love or care. Every motion, every caress, and every kiss that Edward gave me sent my head spinning and begging for more. I had never felt so comfortable in my life as I felt his body all over me.

Finally, he pulled away and stared into my eyes. He looked so sad and vulnerable. He looked away for a brief second and then looked back at me; his mind seemed to be lost in thought. I brought my hand to his face, cupped his chin, and ran my thumb across his face.

"I know what you're thinking, Edward, and you're wrong. This was not just because we had a moment. This was real. You and I are inseparable. Without you, I am nothing. I can not live my life without you and nor can I fight the Volturi alone. I won't win if I do."

His eyes seemed to clear up and his eyebrows relaxed and a much happier and relaxed feeling seemed to have taken over Edward when I said that. Suddenly out of nowhere a huge grin played across his god like face. He pulled me up and helped me gather our things.

"Then you'll be happy to know that none of us could leave you, Bella, and so everyone came!"

My eyes widened in horror.

"EVERYONE? And you let us go on this emotional roller coaster for how long while your family is waiting for you to bring to where ever they are waiting?"

"Bella don't worry about it. Everyone knows you're a difficult person to talk to about things that you've already set your mind to. We'll just tell them we had a little fight and things got physical."

I eyed him questioningly.

"We had a little fight and things got physical?"

He laughed and his ocher eyes never looked so amused or playful. He was so beautiful. He walked towards me and my body started to tingle with the thoughts of what happened the last time he walked up to me. His hand reached toward me and my body started to go wild, my breathing starting to go heavy again. His hand reached toward my face, his eyes still sparkling with amusement. He put his mouth right up to my ear and cupped the back of my head.

"You're a little too dirty to have just gotten in an argument."

He pulled back and pulled a leaf from my hair. His smile was wicked and I gawked at him. He then pointed to the dirt stains on our clothes and then lastly rolled up my long sleeve to show the dirt on my skin. I must have looked horrified because Edward began to howl in laughter.

"So we wrestled a little. No one will ever know."

I glared at him. There is no way that they couldn't know. I'm sure that they all knew by now and they hadn't even seen me! As soon as they would catch a glimpse of us I just knew there would be ridicule and humiliation to follow. I rolled my eyes and then stared back at Edward.

"I love you, you know that?"

At first he looked as if I caught him off guard and then he cocked his head to the side and his face was gone of any humor.

"I do know that, Bella. And I'm doing everything I can to keep you."

I walked toward him and planted a little kiss on his cheek.

"Then take me to OUR family."

He smiled at me and shook his head from side to side.

"I thought you'd never ask."


End file.
